I don't know, just hot and/or weird Mello (Death Note) stories/imagines/whatever.
Mello x reader, unless otherwise stated.
(By reader I mean me, because I love Mello)
Ps. They're probably all ooc and most of them aren't meant to be taken seriously.
I was brought to a mansion, where I found a dead guy on the sofa. But then he wasn't dead, he was a vampire and he started licking and biting me. He was hot, so I let him. The rest of his vampire brothers turned up and told me I was to live with them as their sacrificial bride.
"I don't mind, but my husband will. He might, anyway. He's head of the mafia, he'll bust your asses," I warned them.
"Oh sure he is," Douchebag Grey hair scoffed.
"Fine, don't believe me. It's your funeral."
"We're already dead, little bitch," Hat guy said.
"Oh yeah. Well, he'll make you deader."
"You really are a dumbass, pancake. But you're also mine," I shrieked like a crazy fangirl as the first guy I'd met glomped me.
They all jumped on me at once so they could lick and bite me.
"Kiss me! Take me!" I shouted.
I was enjoying it too much, and automatically yelled Mello's name. He heard me from miles away and kicked the mansion door in a second later.
"What the fuck is going on?! That's my girl!" He yelled even louder than I had.
"The little bitch is ours now."
Mello pointed his gun at the Vampire who'd claimed me.
"Who are you?"
"I'm Laito."
"Lighto? You're Kira."
"No, I'm Laito."
"Oh whatever, you're all dead now," Mello said and got his gun ready.
"They're vampires, you can't kill them."
He swung the gun towards me.
"Is that some bullshit attempt to keep these guys alive? You fucking anime hoe!"
"No, it's the truth."
"You won't shoot..." The red head without hat said.
Of course, Mello immediately shot them all, but the bullets went right through them and none of them died because they were already dead.
Mello made his WTF face.
"Would explosives work, babe?" He asked me.
"I don't know, Mells, I'm not an expert on how to kill vampires. Maybe it's like shinigami, if I make them all fall in love with me..."
"No fucking way!" Mello snarled. "And maybe they wanna fall in love with me."
"Yeah, she's a pretty girl. Maybe we chose her over you," A purple version of Near said.
Mello froze, his mouth open.
"We should play darts to decide who wins which of these two pretty ladies. I get two shots, because my teddy wants to play too."
Mello found his voice, "You little shit, I'm a guy!"
"Yeah right," Everyone said.
"Y/N, tell them!" Mello insisted.
I just nodded because I was trying not to laugh.
"Oh. We could always try yaoi, I guess," The vampire guys said.
Mello grunted loudly and a wild Matt appeared with a smoke gun.
"That won't work either," I said.
"Matt, strip off or something, to distract them," Mello ordered.
"Uh, NO," Matt turned and left again.
"Just take her, she's an annoying little bitch anyway."
"Yes, she is, but she's MY annoying bitch."
Mello stood forward and they all let go of me. He picked me up and carried me out of there. I waved goodbye over his shoulder.
"I left you alone for two minutes," Mello scolded me.
He put me down, I wrapped my arms around him and kissed him.
"You're my superhero, Mello."
[Superhero Mello activated]
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[Longer, more detailed version in my book of the same name as this chapter "Diabolik Whore" It's just for fun and it's meant to suck... Pun, pow pow!]
