𝑳𝑶𝑽𝑬𝑳𝒀 // fillie

35: stars

// 1138 words //

// inspired by i'll be good by jaymes young (i think) //

"I'LL BE GOOD, I'LL BE GOOD"

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M I L L I E

i feel myself being led by hand up the last step, blindfold obscuring my sight, and the soft wind pushing my hair out of my face. under my bare feet is wet earth, and i catch the scent of salt water as finn removes my blindfold from behind me.

my breath catches in my throat when i see the landscape in front of me. we stand on top of a cliff. as the sun goes to sleep the sky bursts out into pink orange and purple, creating swirls of color above us. my gaze travels downward to the huge lake below us, reflecting the sky and soft waves lapping against the shore. i turn around in finns arms to see him gazing down at me, and my lips curve into a smile as i rest my hands on his shoulders.

"it's beautiful." i whisper, laying my head on his chest, feeling his heartbeat. at this moment i feel at peace. happy. "thank you."

i flick my eyes upward to meet his own, and my eyes widen when i see the mischievous expression on finns face. 

"nononono!" i yelp as finn lifts me into his arms and runs clean off solid ground. as in he jumps off the cliff with me clutching onto for dear life, my eyes squeezed shut. for two seconds, all i feel is my stomach sinking and the sound of finns yells over the wind, before we splash into the water, the impact making me fall out of his grip.

i let myself sink in the water, hair floating, trying to make finn think i've drowned. i hear his laugh die down and quickly be replaced with him calling out my name with a fearful tone.

"mills? mills, where are you!" i wait a moment until his calls become urgent and louder, and then i emerge from underwater, latching my arms around finn and pulling him down with me. i hear a sigh of relief come from him, soft breath stirring wisps of my hair, as finn wraps his arms around me as well, pulling me close. 

"don't do that ever again." finn says chuckling.

"no promises." i say tilting my chin up to look at him as i grin. i watch finns gaze go from my face to my shirt, and a smirk appears on his face. i frown, following his gaze, and my cheeks turn a bright shade of red when i see that my white shirt is now completely see through and skin tight from the water, my black bra visible.

i slowly look back up to see finns wide eyes and i push him backwards into the water. "shut up!" 

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we lay under the dark sky, stars above us, as the cool night air caresses our skin.

my head is resting on finns shoulder, his arm holding me close, and our legs intertwined. when it started to get cold and i started shivering, finn gave me his band sweatshirt that will most likely stay with me for the rest of my life. it hangs loose on me and smells just like him, cinnamon and mint, now two of my favorite smells. i snuggle into finn as i stare up at the stars.

"look." i whisper. "that's the big dipper." i trace the constellation with my finger and i see finn look at me. "and that's venus." i point to another bright dot. "it's one of the brightest object in the sky. it's also my favorite planet. you know why?" i turn my head to meet eyes with finn. "venus is named after the goddess of love."

i feel finn start to trace circles on my back.

"i don't know why i'm so into astronomy and all that shit. i guess... i guess i just like to think about what's out there. outside of our tiny little world in hawkins. we leave school and actually go into our lives in less than two years, and i-i don't think i'll know what to do." i pause. "finn, have you ever realized how tiny we are? we are amidst billions of other humans on this planet, and then zoom out to the solar system, then zoom out to the galaxy... we're merely a speck of dust in the universe."

my words falter to a stop as finn tightens his hold on me. "but zoom in." i frown and look at him.

"what?"

"zoom in. go deeper. we all have a story don't we? we might be a speck of dust, but we are one of the specks of dust that makes the universe what it is." i let his words sink in for a moment. "mills?"

"yeah?" 

"what's your favorite color?"

i'm taken aback for a moment. "my favorite color?"

"yeah, lets pretend we're back to being children and none of these teenager burdens exist anymore. what's your favorite color?"

i hesitate. "blue. sea blue. it... it's the color of the necklace my dad gave me when i was little." i never mention the necklace to anyone, mom doesn't even know about it. after a moment, i pull it out from under my shirt and show finn. "it's the last thing he gave me before... before he left. no one knows about it. sometimes... sometimes i like to believe that he still cares about me, that i mean something to him. that i'm more than just the girl that is genetically his."

i bury my face into finns neck before i feel the wetness in my eyes and finns arms instantly wrap around me. 

"it's beautiful, and you're beautiful."

i jerk my head up look at finn. "...what?"

"you're beautiful." finn states blatantly like it's a fact.

"no i'm not." i say shaking my head and leaning back down. "i still don't understand how or why... why you picked me and not some hotter or richer or prettier girl."

finn chuckles, propping himself up on one shoulder. "because i love you, mills. i love every single thing about you. those freckles, that you don't notice you have? i kiss them while you're asleep. your hair that you hate? it's one of my favorite things about you. your smile? i can't live without seeing your smile every day. i love you millie bobby brown."

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wow im so badd at updating someone kill me now

i hate school wow like a lot my best friend is literally a living high school movie and tbh idk how to help her. she likes her friends boyfriend, like a lot, but her crush is her brothers ex friend, and literally everyone in the school now knows abt her crush except for her crush and its a mess lol

question of the day: how old are you?

9/11. never forget. 

- ROSE