Angel

Chapter 16

Dean laid on his bed, his cuts were cleaned up and his eyes still closed. No body could believe that Dean's dead, no body wanted to.

"I'm sorry, Dean. I should have been able to save you, I got my Grace back and I let you die. I let you die! I need you, Dean. I love you." Castiel kissed Dean's hand. "I should have been able to save you but I didn't, I couldn't."

"A little upset, Castiel?"

"Go away, Crowley. I don't have time to deal with you nor do I have the patience. I don't want you here so just leave."

"What if I came here to make a deal and bring him back?" Crowley sassed.

"I'm not making a shitty deal with you, remember how it ended last time? Dean wouldn't want me to." Castiel rested Dean's hand on his forehead.

"But Dean's dead, you can make this decision. You really want to give up all of the cuddling, kissing, sex, and love just to see Dean lying on a bed dead?"

"It was never about that! I loved Dean and that's just what we did! I don't care if he would remember everything, as long as he'd live I would be happy! I could have a second chance to protect him!"

"I could give you that. All it takes is your Grace."

"Get the hell out of here Crowley! I'm not making a shit deal with you." Crowley puffed and was gone. All that was he left was a piece of paper that said 'Deal Or No Deal?' and a line for his signature.

"You doing okay?" Sam stood in the doorway.

"Yeah, sorry. That was Crowley." Castiel wiped his eyes.

"Let me guess: give me your Grace and he'll live blah blah blah blah blah." Castiel chuckled.

"Yes, exactly." Sam smiled.

"I get that this is really hard for you. It is for me too, not that I haven't seen him die before but it's pretty much final this time. I don't want him to go as much as you." Castiel sat himself down on the bed.

"Just to think this is the same bed he would tell me he loves me and we would wrap up in each other and whisper things into each other's ear. Now it's the bed that my dead hunter lays on."

"I know, I'm sorry. Maybe God will be generous and give him back to us, they say he works miracles. I think we deserve one after all we have done for everyone else."

"To be honest, I don't think God cares. I don't think he cares about me enough to bring him back. I don't think he cares about any of us. He might be doing this because I did all that I did with him, it's all my fault and I feel terrible. I took your big brother from you, the big brother that took care of you for practically your whole life." Sam coughed to disguise his choking as he held back tears.

"No, God does still care. If he didn't all of the angels would have fallen. He does care, you're a angel yourself, you shouldn't doubt your father. I don't know how else to put it and not sound any more stupid but we have to trust that He'll bring him back."

"How can you have faith in him? He let him die just like I did. He wouldn't let me zap him to the bunker where I could have saved him! He wouldn't let me heal him! He doesn't give a fuck about me and everything I do for him! He doesn't care!"

"He does care, trust me. You need to get some sleep. It's been a while since you actually slept."

"I can't sleep, I'm a angel again."

"Right, just don't be in here. You shouldn't be looking at him and thinking about it, it won't help you or him." Sam patted his shoulder and left the room.