Soothsayer ⚡ Barry Allen

Goodbye

I frowned at Barry as I sat up in bed, my shirt hanging loosely from my shoulders as a flannel hung unbuttoned from his, his back turned to me as he refiled through drawers. "Do you really have to go?" I whined, crawling over to the edge of the bed so we were closer.

"I can't really tell Joe I was shot three times and had to take the week off. I'll be lucky if I can pass off the time I did take off," Barry explained, not turning to me.

"Wayne can't write you off? Didn't he help get you that job?" I sighed.

"Yeah, he helped me get it, but it's up to me to keep it." I heard static and his flannel clung better to his figure, now buttoned. When he finally turned around he was distracted, jumping a fraction when I grabbed his hand.

"Relax," I advised, running my hand up his arms soothingly. With a deep breath, he put his hands on my sides and met my eye, analytically studying my small smile before I kissed him. "Stay." I whispered it against his lips, crossing my arms behind his neck. His left hand slid down to my hip, tracing his fingers over the sea shell. "Stay..." I drew out, slowly pulling him back towards the bed.

Barry continued to kiss me for a moment before breaking away, his answer clear before I opened my eyes. "I gotta go," he sighed, removing my arms from around him. "I love you."

I hesitated a half second before replying, "Love you, too," kissing him one last time before he escaped my reach. I felt he had to have noticed my sublte reluctancy, even if he just chalked it up to my paranoia over his wellbeing.

"I'll be home before you know it," he assured before leaving the room. Yeah, and I'll be gone before you know it.

⚡

I hastily shoved the rest of my things into the bag as the door to our little hideout closed, picking up the note I intended to leave and stashing it as well as I swore under my breath, cursing one Barry Allen. "Andy?" My face pulled into a grimace as I closed my bag and slung it over my shoulder, a large knot in my stomach as I grabbed another and walked out of our room. When Barry's eyes fell on me, he took a moment to comprehend my hard expression and the bags I carried. "You're leaving?" he asked, his heart audibly breaking with the words.

I felt a tingling at the back of my eyes and took a deep breath. I couldn't be the one to break; not yet, at least. "I am," I replied with a short nod.

"Why?" His voice cracked and I had to force myself to look away from him. I wouldn't be able to keep this up if I didn't.

"I can't keep this up any longer. I can't keep lying to you." Steeling my nerves, I looked up again and stared at the spot between his furrowed eyebrows. "This isn't me, Barry. I'm not good. I'm done poisoning your life."

"But you're not -- I've seen you, the choices you've made--"

"That's not me!" I interjected. I took a deep breath as I felt my patience crumble. "I am the master of deception, Barry," I explained slowly, taking a step closer to him. "I know exactly what you want to hear or see, and I give it to you. That is me."

"No," he denied, shaking his head vigorously. "I refuse to believe that. After everything we've went through--"

I cut him off again; if he tried reasoning with me, it'd work. "I'm a lair, Barry!" I yelled, my chest aching. "All I've ever done is lied to you! Stop trying to save what wasn't there."

"You don't get to say that to me," he snapped, his own anger obvious. "After all that I've done for you, you don't get to say that." I laughed and dropped my bag, hoping to use my laughter to push everything else away.

"I used you. Just like I used everyone else in my life. The longer you drag this out, the more you're only hurting yourself." Well, I was in fact lying to him; saying that he meant nothing, that our time together was a ruse. Each second doing this hurt me too, but it would be damaged after this. Irrepairable. "Just let me go."

"No," he defended adamently. "If you leave, I'll just follow you." I shook my head, my chest lurching in silent sobs that I eventually passed off as more laughter.

"Don't be ridiculous. If I don't want to be found, I won't be, no matter how impossibly fast you are. If you don't want to end up dead, do anything but follow me." I grabbed my bag off the floor and walked past him, my body stiffening when his hand closed firmly just below my elbow. I wasn't facing him, I couldn't. I wouldn't be able to pull on another mask if I had to face him once more.

"Why are you doing this, Andromeda?" Barry's voice broke, I could hear the pain in his voice alone. And it's not like I wanted to do this. If I could, I would've never even thought all the things I had said.

"I'm done wasting your time," I grit out between clenched teeth. "I'm not putting your life at risk because I'm playing a game. Even I'm not that selfish." Barry hesitated at that, his mouth shut as he ran out of things to say. He was realizing he was losing me and I didn't even have to look at him to know it.

"Look," he started slowly, despite me not doing so, "I don't know what the hell you're going through right now, but whatever it is, it's changing you. And I don't care how long it takes. Whenever you get through this, you'll always have a place with me." The first tear finally broke free, a hollow feeling throughout my torso. I just screamed the nastiest things I could think of at him and he was still offering himself up. I couldn't respond, if I opened my mouth the whole point of this would be moot.

Slowly, slower than Barry's done anything in the time I've known him, his grip on my arm eased until his fingers slid away, my legs moving the moment his touch left my skin and not a second before. I could feel my lower lip quivering as I took deep breaths and pulled open the door, the dam in my eyes breaking the second it shut again. I forced my legs to keep moving despite hardly being able to feel them as all my emotions washed over me uncontrolably.

It was like someone went mining for all the stuff I had buried over all these years and struck all the way down to my core, releasing the molten, pure emotion in a huge, messy diaster. All I could possibly focus on right now was getting to Wayne's stashed Porsche.