February Night

Chapter 38

Lucy spent hours at her parents' home. And she couldn't deny that she had missed it. This was the place she and Luke had grown up. She even stepped into her old bedroom, which still had that rosy wall paper on. Lucy smirked. There was her old bed – her parents had never thrown it away. Who knew, maybe she would want to spend a night or two here again. That was what her father had always said whenever she'd asked why they kept her and Luke's room almost the way they had been when the siblings had been living here.

Sighing, Lucy sank down on the mattress while her eyes were still wandering through the room. How many hours did she spend here with Tessa? How many hours had they been laying on the bed, talking about boys, annoying girls at school and teachers? How many times had they spent nights in here, chatting about what would just come to their minds and giggling when Lucy's parents had opened the door and told them to finally sleep.

Tears filled Lucy's eyes once more and she wasn't quick enough to wipe them away before her parents showed up and came in. "Oh, dear", her mother said as she sank down on the bed next to her daughter and wrapped her arms around her. As if that gesture had pulled a trigger inside of Lucy, she broke out in tears; she sobbed loudly and buried her face in her mother's shoulder. It took her almost fifteen minutes to finally pull herself together again.

"I'm so sorry what happened to Tessa", Mrs. Alvez whispered and Lucy could feel her father's hand rubbing her back in an attempt of calming her down.

"I already miss her so much", Lucy chocked out. She then took some deep breaths and was eventually able to hold her tears at bay. When she looked at her parents, who were examining her with concern, Lucy suddenly felt guilty. She finally had to tell her parents the truth. And without thinking too much about it, she did. Lucy told them everything. She told them about that February night where she had to fight for her life and ended up killing a human being. She told them about the fear she had been having and that she had felt like an escape would be the only thing she could do in the end.

Her parents listened to her as Lucy told them her story. She could see their facial expressions change a few times. It was a mix of concern, shock and anger. Especially Lucy's dad looked as if he would have loved to get those guys into his hands.

"Why haven't you told us from the beginning? We would have been there for you!", Mrs. Alvez exclaimed when Lucy had finished. She had managed to tell them everything without breaking out in tears once more. It was as if she was finally getting over this. Lucy shrugged. She felt ashamed. Yes, she should have told them. And afterwards, she thought how dumb she had been for not saying a word much earlier.

"I'm...not sure. I guess I was just incredibly scared. I was afraid that I could go to prison, although I have only done it to safe my life. And I was embarrassed. You have no idea how it is to live with the knowing that you killed someone." The last sentence was almost a whisper and Lucy felt another lump in her throat.

"You've done what you had to do, doll", Mr. Alvez now said and placed a kiss on his daughter's hair. He was sitting on Lucy's other side since a few minutes.

"I just wish you had told us. We had no idea what kind of hell you had to go through", Mrs. Alvez sighed and pressed Lucy closer to her.

"I'm sorry."

But her parents didn't blame her for anything. They were just glad she had finally been honest to them and told them everything. And Lucy promised them to never hold things back again. "And now, I'm going to cook lasagna, okay? You need soul food, my dear", Mrs. Alvez said as she stood up, stroked Lucy's cheek for a moment and then left to spend some hours in the kitchen. Smiling, Mr. Alvez watched her go. Now, Lucy couldn't help but smile a bit as well. Her parents still loved each other like they had done forty years ago. And she thought this was just wonderful. Maybe she and Spencer would end up like this as well one day? She shook her head at that thought. They weren't a couple for a long time yet and who even knew this would work out at last?

"Come on, you can help me with my new puzzle", Mr. Alvez suddenly said and got up from the bed. That way, he pulled Lucy out of her thoughts. Frowning, she followed him downstairs into the living room, where her father had placed a puzzle on the table – almost 1,000 pieces. She started to smile. He had always loved puzzles and now, during his retirement, he spent a lot of time doing some. Either alone or with his wife. And whenever Lucy or Luke would visit, he'd make them to help him too.

Except for the last times, where Lucy had been annoyed by creating a puzzle, she now was thankful for the distraction. Maybe it would help her getting her mind off the fact that her best friend was dead and her brother and the rest of the team tried to find the killer.

Almost three hours later, Lucy and Mr. Alvez had managed to finish that puzzle while Mrs. Alvez had spent her time in the kitchen, cooking for her daughter and husband. The house was filled with the delicious smell of homemade lasagna and it was just now when Lucy started to realize how hungry she was. She hadn't even finished her porridge in the morning because Luke had called and wanted her to come to the office.

Had it only been just a few hours ago that she had been sitting there, eating her breakfast and not knowing that Tessa was dead already? Lucy swallowed hard as she sat down at the table. Her appetite was about to disappear again, but she forced herself to eat. She had to. And her mom's lasagna was the best. Lucy couldn't resist it anyway. Her parents smiled when they saw that she was eating. They clearly had been afraid that she wouldn't eat anything, no matter how delicious it was.

Her mother had been right, Lucy thought half an hour later. She had eaten quite a lot and felt full and comfortable now. Well, as comfortable as someone could be when they knew their best friend had been murdered. Sighing, Lucy stared out the window. She was sitting in her room; had told her parents she would need a bit time for herself. The phone was wandering from her left into her right hand and then back again since minutes. She was thinking of calling Spencer or Luke. She needed to know what was going on in that case. She needed to know if the BAU already had a clue what human monster had killed Tessa. But she was also afraid to find out. This was all just a nightmare, Lucy thought. And she wished she could just wake up and everything would be alright again.