finding you

thirty two

"Theodora!" Brooke spits my name out in a fake-friendly kind of way. I automatically step back so I can see her face. Maybe if she wasn't in freaking six-inch heels we would be of even height.

"Um... hi?" Me and Brooke don't talk. Ever. I think we just say stuff behind each other's back. Well more like she just says stuff. Oh God, I hope this is not about Rhys.

She smiles down at me. I hate the way superiority radiates off her-- not even superiority, more like just plain bully. Brooke has always been a mean girl so I know her intentions are never good. I just hate the way she manages to make me feel beneath her. I can tell she knows how uncomfortable she makes me because she seems to stand a little bit taller because of it. I hate that.

"You look so cute tonight, Theodora!"

Can she stop saying my name like that? Speak, Theo. Say something. Or just walk away. Yeah, just do that.

I'm about to do just that when she grabs my arm. I look down at her hand in disgust before looking up at her. 

Is she seriously touching me right now?

"I just wanted to say how happy I am for you. Rhys told me about it." Her prickly smile hasn't left her mouth once and I'm starting to think maybe it's just stuck like that. 

Wait, what the heck is she talking about? What the hell did Rhys tell her?

"Told you about what?" I say, sounding just as confused as I am. I try to pull my arm out of her grasp but she doesn't budge with her grip. What is her deal with touching me?

"That he was your first kiss!" She basically announces it, her voice suddenly getting louder while mine seems to have disappeared entirely.

I blink twice. She's still there. Her smug face is still in that smiley bitchiness expression. 

Did I hear her correctly? This can't be happening. 

A few snickers around me and the fact it seems to have gotten quieter confirms it to be so. 

"I-I don't... he wasn't-"

"He told me about how scared you were. I totally thought he meant he fucked you. Oh my God, like I could tell you were a virgin but I didn't think you were an actual prude. Someone's a little afraid of boys."

Laughs erupt all around me and I immediately feel as if I had just got punched in the gut. The room seems to be getting smaller around me and suddenly I am finding it harder to breathe.

Stop talking. Stop talking. No way. This is not happening. This is a literal nightmare. I don't even think I'm registering what's happening. I haven't moved. Why the hell haven't I moved?

"A little advice... maybe don't choose Rhys for your first big-girl experience. He can get really, really rough in the bedroom. Are you scared to even touch yourself? You're like the same exact person as you were in high school. You're like twenty now, aren't you? I-"

"BROOKE." 

A loud voice booms over hers. I'm not even sure who it is. I can't think properly right now. This has to be all in my head. My ears are thumping so loud I can't hear the voices around me or the music. 

Wait, is that my heart or my throat making that noise? Because hell, I can sure feel it in my throat.

My eyes start to take in my surroundings. It's like everything's in slow motion: people talking and laughing and suddenly it's quiet and they're looking as if a fight is about to break out.