She's My Girlfriend!

Chapter 38: Daney's Confession

Who cares?" She asked as she gave me a stern look. I looked her in the eye and knew she was serious.

"What do you mean who cares? Have you ever liked a girl before? How do you even understand how I'm feeling right now?" She rolled her eyes as she gave up on folding as well.

"For you information, Jem, I did like a girl before. And I was just as confused as you are right now except I didn't have the luxury of having someone help me out with it." I stood there with my jaw hanging open and feeling rather... well very rude. I shoved my suitcase aside as I took a seat next to her.

"Why didn't you tell me? What happened?" I asked her. She gave me a weak smile as she looked elsewhere.

"Well... Her name was Vanessa-."

"Wait... wasn't she your..."

"My best friend? Yeah, that would be the one. Well... one night we were in my room, just watching a movie, when she just out of the blue just kissed me. What scared me most of all... was when she moved away from me. I had pulled her back into me... of course I fully realized what we were doing and demanded she went home right away.

She tried to calm me down and tell me things like how she has been attracted to me for a long time but... well I couldn't handle that right then. I avoided her for weeks, even though we had some of the same classes and our lockers were right next to each other. But... I kept letting the memory of her lips on mine and how... perfect it felt. I couldn't help but wonder exactly what you're wondering; did I like girls? If I liked girls... did I like Vanessa? What did that make me? Was I gay?" She gave me a look and sighed.

I sat next to her as I let mine and Jedean's memory fade back into my mind. I had literally never felt more at peace then when she had her arms wrapped around me the past few days... How when she kissed me, it felt like she was putting as much passion into each and every one of them. I felt a shiver run up my spine though when I thought of her kissing more than just... one person though. "What are you thinking?"

"So, what happened after that?" I asked, trying to make it look like that's all was on my mind.

"Well... I came to terms with my liking of girls and finally told Vanessa... we dated for a good 3 years..." She sighed as she watched my reaction.

"Oh my god! You guys were dating the entire time?! How did you handle having to hide it?" I asked eagerly as I sat on the bed next to her. I felt extremely bad now.

Here I was, complaining about my problems when Daney was having problems too! I didn't even think to consider how she was doing.

I was so upset that she didn't tell me this from beginning... but then again with how I was acting right now, I don't really blame her. She looked at me for a moment then glanced up at the ceiling.

"Yeah, we dated for 3 years and two months actually. We were terrified of our families finding out and our friends and just... anyone at school. It was really hard as we became... well serious with each other. As our two year anniversary came around, Vanessa was more at peace with herself.

She discovered she was a fully on lesbian and really wanted to come out to both our families and tell them about our love for one another.

Well... I was too scared to tell mom because of her always being stressed out with all the work she had to do to support us, and well... you were just too young and would probably of found it disgusting.

We fought constantly fought over it and such. As our last summer came around... we were always fighting with coming out or not so she said she didn't want to be with me anymore. Then she went to college and well, here I am." She said with a half-hearted smile.

There was a question I really wanted to ask... but I wasn't sure if it was my place to. She looked at me quizzically.

"Daney... do you uh..." I couldn't bring myself to ask it though. She raised her brow at me and gave me a warm, tired, smile.

"Do I still love her? Yes, I love her a lot still. I probably always will, but you know, that's alright with me. Because... she meant a lot to me and I miss her every day and I wish I had the guts to come out to our mom, because... I know if I did... Vanessa would come back to me in a heartbeat..." She gave me a look before smiling a watery smile. I felt my heart cry for her as I watched tears roll down her cheeks. "I'm sorry, I'm being a pathetic loser. I guess I just know I'll always be in love with her.

Look, my point is that you shouldn't ignore these feelings just because you're scared of what society thinks. If you like the girl, then I think you should explore it. Otherwise, don't put yourself through the heartache of being confused."

A/N: Sometimes close-minded society ( people ) sucks.. not all but some..