His Broken Testimony: COMPLETED ✅

Chapter 34: Breathin

Some days, things just take
Way too much of my energy
I look up and the whole room's spinning
You take my cares away
I can so over-complicate, people tell me to medicate
Feel my blood runnin', swear the sky's fallin'
I know that all this shit's fabricated
Time goes by and I can't control my mind
Don't know what else to try, but you tell me every time
Just keep breathin' and breathin' and breathin' and breathin'

Ryan POV

I couldn't stop the tears from falling from my eyes as I stared at her and she stared at me with the same watery eyes. I didn't know what I was suppose to do. Should I hug her, tell her I'm sorry, sorry that I wasn't enough to help her through her darkness. Should I be angry with her, tell her to leave. My heart raced and broke all at the same time. A part of me always thoughts she was dead, that the drugs had finally ended her but with her standing in front of me right now she looked healthy and put together and she's Anthony's therapist. That means she has her shit together more than me, so didn't she come back for me.

When I finally got the courage to open my mouth to speak I saw out the corner of my eyes my father coming towards us fast and angry. Following my sights my mother turned to look at what had caught my attention and right there she froze. Fear and panic trapped her in her place as her body started to tremble. I know that look, that feeling, the fear but my father didn't even give her a second glance as he stood just inches away from me. Nostrils flared , fist balled up as if he wanted to put fear in my heart or even strike me but I stood there tall wiping my tears away because they weren't for him. He didn't deserve them, didn't deserve to see them.

"You think you're going to take this church from me. You and your hoodlum friends." His voice was laced with anger.

"Yes that's exactly what I know we're going to do...James."

A growl left his lips as he leant in closer but at the same time my mother gripped my wrist pulling me a little closer to her almost like she wanted to protect me though she was still shaking in fear herself. My father caught the action causing his eyebrows to frown enough more before taking his glance away from me and putting it on her. We watched as his eyes roamed her face. It took him a few seconds until his face formed a shocked expression beofre his lips turned up into a smile. His hand reached up to touch her face causing my mother to jump back. He wanted to see if he still had that control over her and he does. He always laughed like the devil he is. I hate him, hate him enough more for what he's done to her.

"You know you're just like her." James spoke as he turned back to me.

"I've been told."

"The both of you are weak and worthless." If this was a few months ago those words would've hurt but his opinon means nothing to me. I could tell the affected my mother though by the way she gripped my wrist tighter.

"Never weak, my nana didn't raise us to be weak. Only found ourselves in a situation where weak ass little boys used their strength to break us." Not caring that a cussed inside a church. "But we can heal...we will heal but you nor Jahaml can change who you are...who you were born to be."

James raised his hand as if he was about to hit me before he stopped himself. He most have remembered he was in a church in front of all these judgment church folks. He has a image to uphold and hitting me here wasn't a good choice. Taking a deep breath he bent over from his full height do that his lips were right next to my ear.

"You think that drug addict can protect you...can save you. He can't even save himself just like your mother. They are going to leave you all over again but the only difference now is that your grandmother isn't here to help you...you'll be back." He smirked as he pulled away.