Bulletproof (a superflash story)

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"So... there's an alien attack happening, and supergirl could really help... you up for it" Alex says and I look at her, pull of my glasses and rip my shirt open, ruining the shirt itself as each button flies off so I can't wear it again. "I'm always up for being supergirl" I say and I fly out the window a nice feeling of air floating past me makes me almost forget about what's going on, but nothing could do that. I arrive to find a laser shooting alien, nothing I can't handle, I fly over to her and hit her over the head with my fist. She falls to the floor but speedily gets back up and as her brown hair flicks into her face, I see mon-el she looks nothing like him but I see him, I see mon-el. I completely collapse, falling to my knees and crying, why am I crying? I'm the girl of steel, I don't cry. I don't have human emotions because they are so stupid, I tell myself, and then I hear the police sirens, cops are here, the NCPD has arrived and so is the DEO and I guess they can handle this threat so I jump up and fly away wanting to scream as the tears keep falling. I lost mon-el and I will have to live with that. I fly back to my apartment and I sit down behind the sofa and I freak out, the walls are closing in, I'm terrified, I don't know what I'm feeling but I know why. I'm hyperventilating, screaming, crying watching as my perfect world disappears and then for 5 seconds it stops, and I can't feel anything, and that's the worse feeling, because you can't feel anything. The 5 seconds feels like it will last an eternity but it doesn't and it's strange and confusing. I sit in my supergirl suit, the logo that is suppose to stand for truth justice and idealism, covered by my knees and ridiculous red boots and my cape, that constantly gets in the way is just there not doing anything when I wish it would. I'm crying, crying and crying not wanting to feel anything else other than pain, which is strange. I curl up with myself, surrounding myself with my cape desperate for a secure and safe feeling, a feeling of want. I can hear my phone ringing and vibrating on the table. I don't want to pick it up, I don't care who's calling. I want the phone to die, so I scream but no scream comes out as my laser eyes act and destroy my phone and I watch as it slowly fries and then explodes, that shouldn't have happened, oh shit it set the table on fire, I sit up a bit more and use my freeze breath to put out the fire on the table and then I curl myself back up not bothering to look at the damage. I'll get a new phone, that one just reminded me of mon-el like everything in this stupid apartment, everywhere I look I see him, I see mon-el he's been gone about 2 weeks since I let him go, why did I do that? Why did I let him go?? I hear myself screaming these questions quicker and quicker and quicker and then it becomes a mix up words into one long thing and in the end all I do is cry...
However a blue swirly portal opens up and out runs Barry Allen, the flash.