the society imagines

harry x reader

(a/n) - so I guess I should put a little disclaimer at the beginning but there is a super brief mention of a possible suicide (don't worry, it is nothing crazy!) I thought I would mention it anyway. enjoy!
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"We've tried talking to him but it hasn't done much good. Allie is going to completely cut his rations if he doesn't start showing up for work," Luke said. You nodded and glanced towards the closed bedroom door.

It had been weeks since you had last seen Harry. You had gotten pretty close when the busses first dropped you back off at the school and Kelly ended things with him after the party. Then, things started falling apart and he had started taking drugs from Campbell. You hated that he was doing this but every time you tried to talk about it with him, he brushed you off and told you that you were being too clingy and not letting him have fun. Eventually, you had stopped talking to him altogether. But now you were thinking that shutting him out probably wasn't the best idea.

"I'll do my best," you said, faking a smile. Luke gently patted your arm and walked away, leaving you to prepare yourself for the worst.

You pushed the door open gently and gaped at the disaster in front of you: piles of uneaten food covered the surface of his desk and bedside table, clothes were strewn all over the floor to the point where the carpet was invisible, and Harry was in the middle of his bed, curled into a tight ball with fresh tears staining his cheeks.

"Harry," you whispered, not wanting to startle him because you doubted he had heard you enter the room. He wouldn't let you see him cry, no matter how bad things were.

He glanced over to you, but continued to let the tears fall. "Just get out."

You did the opposite, stepping fully into the room and letting the door latch behind you. You pulled his curtains open and started to pick clothes up to lead a trail to his bathroom. "I'm not going to let you slowly kill yourself in here. Allie is going to cut off your rations, and people aren't going to be generous and give you food for very long," you said, sitting on the edge of the bed and shoving him.

He barely flinched at the harsh touch and pulled the comforter over his head. "I'm serious, (Y/N). Get out."

"You're like this because of Campbell, aren't you? I swear, I'm going to kill him for getting you involved in drugs. You were perfectly fine before he decided to sink his teeth into you," you seethed. You started to pull drawers open, hoping to find whatever pills Campbell had hooked him on lately.

Harry laughed, making you stop immediately. Glancing back, with light now touching his features, you could really see him. He was extremely pale, and his face was thinner, his cheekbones sticking out. You felt yourself break, and your eyes pooled with tears.

"You think this is the drug's fault?" He paused and you nodded slowly, wanting to reach out and touch his face, but refraining. "Campbell hasn't given me anything in a long time. Which I suppose could be part of the problem but ultimately I just don't want to be here anymore."

"No one does," you whispered, making Harry scoff and roll his eyes at you.

"I thought you would be smart enough to understand what I'm implying but I guess I'll just spell it out for you," he sighed. "I don't care about the rations. I don't care about no one wanting to give me food when I don't have any. I don't care because I don't want to be here. Alive."

You were stunned at his words and even more shocked at the sobs that were shaking his body so violently that you were sure he was going to shatter any minute. Your arms were immediately around him, and he was hanging onto you like his life depended on it. You couldn't help but notice that he usually felt so sturdy but now felt frail and weak.

"Don't say that. Please," you whispered, your tears now starting to fall as well. "I need you."

"No, you don't. You left me. You decided that I wasn't good enough for you," he said, trying to pull away but you kept him pressed up against you.

"Harry," you whispered, hurt that he would even think that. "I love you, I'll always love you. I couldn't watch someone I love go through so much pain. I know that you thought the drugs would solve all your problems but they were making things so much worse. I was trying to help you."

"At least I couldn't feel anything when I had them. Now everything feels like too much to handle. I just can't do it," he hiccuped.

You pulled his face up to yours and shook your head. "It isn't too much to handle. You are literally the strongest guy I know. You need to stay here with me. You're the only family I have left," you said, breaking on the last sentence. You hadn't realized it until that moment, but ever since you had started dating you felt like you finally had a family again and you couldn't bear the thought of losing that.

"Will you help me?"

You nodded and pressed your forehead against his, breathing in his familiar scent. "Of course I will. I'm so sorry I left you, especially when you needed it the most. It will never, ever happen again."

He wrapped his arms around your shoulders and hugged you tightly. When you had both finally calmed down a little, you stood up and grabbed him a clean hoodie and pair of jeans. He sniffled and furrowed his brows as he watched you carry them into the bathroom.

"You need to shower. Our kitchen shift is in an hour," you said, giving him a little smile.

He brightened up, the light was beginning to return to his eyes. "God, I've missed hearing that."

"What?" You helped him stand, steadying him as he slipped out of his sweatpants and t-shirt.

"Our, we, us. It's nice to have you here with me again," he said, allowing you to help him to the bathroom.

"Get used to it. I'll be here for the foreseeable future. I love you, Harry."

"I love you so much more (Y/N)."