ONE LOOK [ BLACKPINK ROSÉ X FEMALE READER ]

XXXII.) holding him & loving you

~ flashback ~

Chaeyoung's pov
"He's a gentleman indeed Chaeng. I like him." appa said to me while patting Chanyeol at the back of his shoulder, earning a sly smile from him as he looked down in humility.

I decided to stay for a day here in LA because my parents are here and they're asking me if I have a boyfriend yet. Surprisingly, Chanyeol is in here too, so I took it as an opportunity to finally introduce him to my parents.

In my part, it's very hard for me to do it because Y/N kept on ringing at the back of my mind and the guilt I'm feeling eats me piece by piece and then all at once.

I only loved Chanyeol because he could give me what a woman needs from a man, that's it. Purely material things.

Y/N however, can make me emotional with just a simple thought or an action, or even with a single photograph. And that clearly makes a huge difference for the both of them.

//

We just left the hotel where my parents stays at and decided to eat at a secluded coffee shop to avoid the media.

The shop doesn't have that much customers so it made my nerves relax a bit knowing we're away from the public eye.

Along our conversation, I can't help but to feel giddy inside but there's something missing. I do love him but when I'll start imagining ourselves having a family together, it just doesn't click. My mind wanders back to my promise for my family, and it makes me wonder;

I only love the idea of fulfilling my promises for my parents, but not directly to him.

He pulled his palms away from my face as I took it as an opportunity to use the bathroom. His touch feels foreign compared to Y/N's

"I'll just go to the bathroom." I stood up giving him a short smile to avoid any suspicions and went towards the bathroom.

I locked the door and stared myself through the mirror.

"Not now Rosé, just a bit more time and all of this would be over." I reminded myself as I took deep breaths and checked myself in the mirror and finally going back to our table.

I masked up my face with a smile and went back to our current conversation earlier.

"So I was saying..."

//

We just finished doing the fan signing event and we're now heading to the dressing room to fix our make up.

That fan who mentioned Chanyeol haven't been gone inside my mind for a while now and it's not helping my current state anymore.

My anxiety would go nuts if I don't tell my feelings to somebody.

As I glanced around the room, seeing most of them are busy, I took it as an opportunity to message my sister Alice.

Me:
I need to tell you something or else I'll go insane.

While I'm waiting for her reply, I heard the door open, and hearing my girlfriends voice made me exit the messages in my phone and opened my instagram.

I could see the worry plastered on her face as she sat down in the corner of the room infront of me.

She must not see me all panicky and stuff because I don't want her to be worried and ask me if there's something wrong; because that would lead me to spilling everything to her. So I decided to take a picture of myself to post something on instagram.