THINGS HAPPEN FOR A GODDAMN REASON. Damn I thought this year was going to be the worst. But yoooooooo shitty 5ish months are leading too some great fucking days now. Without all the pain and events that went on from January to May, without all the lessons and growing I've made, without things happening in certain way, I wouldn't be as happy as I am now. I feel like I'm at the top of the world and I know it's only going to get better. This probably makes no sense. But I love all the bad shit that happened this year and I wouldn't be where I am without it. I would never ever change the past. I'd kill myself before I'd change the past. I'd go through the month of January to May a million times again if it means I get to be as happy as I am now. This has been the hardest year but I'd go through it all again just to be as happy as I am now. Because bro I am soooooo happy. And just three months ago I was depressed as fuck and I would go back to my lowest point a million times because dude it's having an amazing outcome and I'm appreciating now more than ever. I can't recall a time I've been happier in my life.
Let me just explain something about destiny and how THINGS ARE MEANT TO BE. THINGS ARE FUCKING MEANT TO BE. GODDAMNIT AND ITS AMAZING HOW THINGS HAPPEN.
Once I have this journal fully updated you will understand a bit better where I am coming from but that's not the case right now.
So Sam's D&D campaign has been going on since the beginning of the year. I've only been in since May. Jenna introduced me to D&D. Which introduced me to Sam In the month of May. In January I was with Jo. So I was like taken. And was going through a lot in my life. Jenna could've invited me early but she didn't and that's a great thing. I wouldn't have been mentally ready to do something like that. I was also in a relationship with someone else and it was toxic. I wouldn't have fallen for Sam if I was with someone else. So in January it was still first semester and second semester was about to start. I wanted to switch back into creative writing. Which would mean and which meant I wasn't in the same class as Jenna anymore. So she didn't get a chance to tell me about d&d earlier on. Which is a good thing it didn't happen sooner since things happen in specific way and in a certain order for a reason. And that reason is destiny. I am convinced. So I switched classes and no longer had a class with her. While I was in the other class. I was doing awful in the class. I was in this class doing awful in it and just in life in general. I went through a bunch a drama and stuff getting in the way of being happy in the slightest. This meaning I wasn't mentally happy at all. Then BAM my ex Jo breaks up with me in March, and my life is completely falling apart and I am going through the worst time of my life. I do even worse in these classes I switched. I go to my counselor and switch back into the class with Jenna in the month of April. If I would've done this any sooner I wouldn't have been ready to meet my other half, these things happened when they did. I was done with Jo and the drama getting in the way of being happy but I am not quite there. I almost moved to Texas a month before Jenna introduced me to d&d, and if I moved to Texas I wouldn't know Sam. Jenna introduces me to a game called d&d in May. In May I'm a lot better and more happy. Okay the moment I heard Sam's voice I kind of fell for him but I didn't think much of it. May 31st I come to the realization I like Sam. I waited and didn't act on these feelings until July 2nd, boy I waited along time and I told him I liked him as y'all know. And on July 4th we became officially in a relationship. If any of these events happened slightly differently I wouldn't be in a relationship with Sam right now.
If I didn't switch classes when I did, if jo didn't break up with me when he did, if that drama didn't happen when it did, I wouldn't not be as happy as I am now.
I swear to god this is meant to happen. I've never been so convinced I've found my soulmate. I know I've found the one. I know he is the one. Things like this don't happen for no reason. All these bad events have happened for a reason. I am where I am now for a reason. What happened in the past happened so I could meet Sam at the perfect time.
I probably sound mega stupid but I know this is fate
