blue (book one) - h.s. ✔️ watty's 2019

chapter 57 - Jax

I swear I have never worked so damn hard in my entire life. The last bit of the scholarship essays Parker has forced down my throat are finally complete, and a wave of accomplishment washes over me as I hit the submit button. The deadline for the submissions is less than a week from today, but Park insisted that I complete them today so that I didn't have to worry later on. He's always so considerate of others. I feel like I'm never doing enough for him.

I rub my hands over my face in frustration as I throw the laptop in the backseat of my truck. I've been sitting in the One Shot parking lot working for the past couple of hours partly because it's relaxing partly because I just don't want to be at home right now.

My return to reality has not been the easiest. It's been a lot trying to get back into the rhythm of work and normal life. It's only been about a week since I was living life without a care in the world, but the memories seem so distant now.

I shudder at the thought of throwing college into the mix.

The only thing that I do miss about being home is my truck. It feels like it's been forever since I've driven her.

I look around the empty parking lot and smile. It's the first time Park and I hung out together. My intentions were so much different back then. Everything with him is just so much different now.

It doesn't even feel like this is life anymore. Being out on the open road, seeing the world with Parker, now that felt real. This- this is some type of obstacle.

I don't even notice that I'm driving down the old road until I do.

As I pull into the old driveway of a house that seems so insignificant now I can't help but grow nervous at seeing my. . . friends?

No, I wouldn't call them that.

Acquaintances?

Nah, I know the shits better than that.

I don't know.

It doesn't matter.

I open the door, walking inside without knocking. I hear several distinct voices before I see anyone. The house looks the exact same way it did when I was here several months ago. I'm sure that even the trash littering the hallway is from then too.

I wouldn't be surprised.

When I round the corner I come face to face with an old part of my past that feels so insignificant now. The smell of smoke and alcohol burn my nose as I continue further into the living room.

"Harold!" Amy shouts causing me to flinch inwardly. She's always called me by my actual name, but now it just feels wrong coming from her mouth. Her dark hair looks greasy swaying around as she hops over Niall and Derek lying on the floor.

Niall and Derek. The two used to be my best buds. Their bodies look lifeless down on the floor and if I didn't know better I'd worry for their safety. The twins have always been the more wilder ones in the bunch. This doesn't surprise me.

She runs over kissing me on the lips as she steadies herself from nearly tripping over the boys.

Flashes of her naked body pop into my mind before I push her away from me, disgusted.

"Don't kiss me," I spit and she looks at me confused.

I almost feel bad for her until she reaches around forcefully sticking her tongue down Zayn's throat.

Same old girl.

"What's gotten into you?" she sneers at me after she's done with the boy, hopping off of his lap. Her fishnet tights can be seen through her ripped skinny jeans and I honestly can't fathom I once considered her a huge part of me. I know more about her body more than I do her personal life.