blue (book one) - h.s. ✔️ watty's 2019

chapter 90 - Gemma

"Gemma?" I start in disbelief.

As much as my mind and heart are unwilling to acknowledge her presence, my baby sister stands right before my eyes. She looks. . . tired. Her hair as well as her yellow dress is worn out and tattered. Her eyes hold a mix of disbelief, as I'm sure my own carry as well, and relief. She hasn't grown an inch. If anything, she's gotten smaller, weirdly. Her once full and complete frame is now thin and incomplete. Her arms as well as her legs have decreased in thickness. Other than the slight pudge that portrudes through her dress around her midsection, she has undeniably lost weight. It's been what two, three years since I've last seen her. Who knew so much could change in such a short time-span? Dropping the rest of the groceries, I close the distance between my little sister and I hugging her tightly. Tears breach my eyes involuntarily as she wraps her hands around my waist. Despite her blatant decrease in body mass, she looks exactly like our mum. She always has.

"Where have you been?" I breathe still in disbelief, holding her at arms length now. Her face is covered in dirt and grime and just about everything else you can think of. My eyes repeatedly switch between her lifeless orbs to the small gash across the top of her forehead. The dress she's wearing used to be one of mun's favorite. It's amazing how much she reminds me of her in this moment. The dirt layered across her face and all. Towards the end of my mum's "freedom" she was always working hard to support the both of us. I remember her coming home after a long work day tired and beat from her restaurant job. When things got much lighter around the house, more happier, she'd pack Gem and I a small lunch and we'd go out and eat in the barn out back. Her small attempt at making fonder memories would always end with Gem sneaking into the chicken hen and disturbing the poor birds. We never really had a dull moment in this old house. She was so young. She is so young.

"I've missed you so much," she cries, ignoring my question. My heart lurches for her. Instead of waiting for her to respond, I pull her back into a tight hug, sobbing silently as I run my hands through her rough hair. She feels so broken, so lifeless in my arms. The once bright-eyed, innocent sister I grew up knowing is now only a former shadow of the lighter times that I hold in few. She even smells like mum. Her arms tighten around my midsection thought it's not painful. Her strength has dissipated along with her feeble body. I'm so wrapped in her foreign presence that I forget the love of my life standing behind me patiently.

"Ge-Gem. This is Parker," I start, lightly tugging at her arm to introduce her to the blue-eyed boy.

"Hi," he begins reaching his hand out to take shake hers. Only then do I realize that no one in my family is aware of my new. . . interest in the same sex. Growing up, my household never really had a problem with homosexuals. We just never really knew anybody in the small town that identified as. To be frank, I have never known anyone part of the community until I met some of the guys in my fraternity. Jax was the most complexing surprise when he finally admitted it. No, he wasn't really hiding it. I guess because I only ever saw him sleeping around with various girls in our sister frat I never gave thought to him liking guys. The only person I can think of having a problem with this is dead to me. I swear if I ever see the bastard again, I will kill him with my bare hands. And that's a fucking promise. She accepts, flashing me a look of confusion before turning back around mouthing 'who is this?' Now that I think of it, Gem is more like Park than I am. They both carry a gentle nature that's bound to this Earth. Gemma was always the even tempered one. When things started to get out of hand in the house it was usually her that played the mediator. I don't think I can remember a time when she was anything other than calm and collected. Even when my mum and dad would argue and throw things and hit one another she remained even. Not to mention her undying love for the environment. Honestly, she's much more inolved than the plant-loving boy. I'm not sure what all has changed about her, because there is a change, but if she's anything like the Gemma I grew up with, they'll get along swimmingly.

I smile widely, knowing of her accepting nature before walking over to him. I wrap my arm around his tiny waist, pulling him closer into my side as her brows scrunch together even more. Smirking, I bend down to lightly graze his forehead before looking back up to her shocked expression. He smiles warmly up at me before I redirect all of my attention back to the blond-haired girl in front of me. Then, as if it is my turn to flash a look of confusion, the sound a of a baby's cries break out in the next room. My body stiffens immdediately as the now loud cry fills the empty house. I stare at Gemma with a fearful expression that she meets with a knowing grin. Her once lifeless eyes carry a different emotion in them. . . an unreadable emotion. Parker looks up at me questioningly, yet stays silent directing his attention back to her wide, chestnut eyes. In spite of the restless voice wailing throughout the house, I can clearly hear the sound of my heavy breathing in the wide room.

"We have a lot to talk about."

With that, her body descends into the dark room towards the loud cry.