such a softer sin | gerbert

chapter forty six

Gerard watches sadly as Bert stares down into his glass as he gently spins his cup around to watch the ice cubes circle in the alcohol. His chin rested on his hand, held up by his elbow on the bar island's counter top. His mind seems to be somewhere else. He's been upset all day, hasn't talked much. No sweet banter like usual, just silence.

"You don't have to be here tonight Bert. Go to the apartment and rest, I'll be okay." Gerard says as he watches him. Seeing him upset all day has killed Gerard. Bert's seen Zach a few months back ans it didn't effect him like it is now. But then again, Gerard doesn't know everything that's gone on.

Bert lifts his head from his hand and finishing off his drink. "No, I'm okay. I'm sorry I'm not myself today."

"Don't apologize, it's okay. I know you're upset. I get off soon, we're gonna go home and talk." Gerard says. He's going to try and get Bert to open up a little tonight. He's worried about him. If they're going to be together then they need to be able to talk things like this out with one another.

As much as he wanted to stay home in bed all day, Bert didn't want Gerard to come into work alone tonight. Not willing to risk Zach possibly showing back up again tonight, expecting Bert but only seeing Gerard. He isn't going to risk Gerard getting hurt.

Thanks to the several strong drinks Bert downs, time seems to go by quickly for him before Gerard's off of work. He stares out with window as Gerard drives. Thinking about Zach, his friends, his mom.

Arriving home, Bert heads to the bedroom. Gerard goes into Mikey's room, making sure that he's asleep and covered up before making sure everything's locked up. Heading to the room, he sighs when he sees Bert already passed out in bed.

Gerard sadly laughs at his drunken lover before stripping of his shirt and pants, joining him in bed. Pulling the blanket over them both and turning out the lamp on the night table beside the bed.

Bert tiredly rolls over and places a soft kiss on the red heads lips. "I'm sorry."

• • •

Bert smiles as he softly squeezes Gerard's hand. The two lay in bed together, binge watching Criminal Minds. He's feeling much better today, and feels really bad about yesterday. Being closed off, drinking infront of his boyfriend who's in the middle of sobriety.

He watches the red head who sits beside him. Watching the light from the t.v agains the dark room flash over him. His eyes glued to the screen as he bites his bottom lip in anticipation of what'll happen next as he often does.

"You're amazing, you know that?" Bert says rather randomly. Gerard's eyes move from the screen and to Bert, realizing he's been staring at him. Gerard laughs at the random compliment. "No, really. You're the best boyfriend anyone could ask for."

"Mm, boyfriend. I like hearing that." Gerard smiles. The sound of him referring to them as boyfriends still makes his heart implode. It's been so nice finally being together the past few weeks. Bert laughs at his lovers charm before softly kissing his lips.

The two lean back as they kiss until Gerard soflty hums, queuing a pause. He pulls away from the kiss and Gerard plays with Bert's hair. "Where's this coming from sugar."

"I just really love you, and I haven't expressed that much recently. Thank you for everything you do for me, I don't know what I'd do without you." Bert says. Gerard means the absolute world to him and he needs him to know that.

"I love you too, so much." Gerard smiles and softly kisses him again. As the kiss deepens, Gerard runs his hand through Bert's hair. Biting his lip as Bert begins kissing down his jaw, his tattooed hands gripping his waist.

Though they're quickly pulled apart when loud shots are heard. Though they both let out a breath of relief when they realize it was only the t.v show. Bert laughs shaking his head before resting back into the bed with Gerard, the two continuing to watch the show.

"I'm taking you out tomorrow night. Dinner, a walk maybe. Let Mikey go to Pete's or something." Bert whispers in Gerard's ear from behind, as he's leaned back into Bert's body. Rested in the warm and comforting embrace of his tattoos arms.

Gerard smiles to himself. He doesn't know how he got so lucky, but he thanks God for him every night.

[I know this chapter's really boring and uneventful ok im sorry]