I Know Who I Am Now

Settling in.

"Hi, I'm Rose" the cheery girl sat in front of Rey chirped, a bandage still wrapped around her head.  "I'm Rey.  Glad to see you're doing better.  I hear I have you to thank for saving Finn".  She watched the girls round face flush and for a moment they sat in silence.  The door behind Rey opened and she turned in time to see Finn enter, a wide smile across his face.  Rey was about to smile back when she realised that Finn wasn't smiling at her, he was smiling at Rose.  Rey watched him rush forwards and the two embraced, pulling apart after a moment and then kissing on the lips.  Now it was Rey's turn to blush as she made her excuses and left.

Tiredness consumed Rey as she made her way to her makeshift bedroom in the castle and she wasted no time when she reached her room, sliding under the covers and lying with her face upturned to the ceiling, her eyes closed.  She lay like that for a while, willing herself to sleep but in the end she rolled out of bed groaning.  She couldn't sleep.  

She went and sat by the window, watching the moonlight ripple on the lake and thought of Finn and Rose.  She had never seen that sort of affection before between a man and woman.  Her face coloured as she thought of the breathless way that they pulled apart only to kiss again, lost in the moment.  Quite without realising her mind went to Ben.  She thought of their conversation in the elevator, of how close she found herself getting.  She could smell him, a light, clean smell.  She had watched his chest rise and fall, the motion of it increasing as she got closer to him.  His eyes had roamed her face and in that moment she had wondered if he would kiss her.  What would that have felt like? Rey found herself wondering, before quickly pushing the thought away, only to be replaced by the face of Poe. 

Her eyes suddenly heavy, Rey climbed back into her bed and closed her eyes, inhaling deeply. Rey thought of Poe as she began to drift into sleep.  Maybe she should give him a chance.  It could help her get over Ben and maybe she might even find out what it felt like to be kissed by a man.

Kylo froze, his heart pounding furiously.  There it was again, whispering.  He moved forwards slowly then and when he reached his grandfathers helmet he stopped.  A strange blue light shone around it like never before and suddenly the room felt cold, sending shivers up Kylos bare chest.  The light grew brighter and suddenly he saw it, a blue glowing figure stood behind the mask.  Kylo froze, his hand rushing down for his sabre and then realising that it was on his belt on the other side of the room.  As he looked at the figure it became clearer.  It was a young man, similar in age to him, dressed in what looked like Jedi robes.  "Ben" the figure said in an echoey voice.  Kylo was frozen to the spot, his mind reeling, could that be, could that be his grandfather?  "Who are you?" Kylo said, trying to hide the shake in his voice as he spoke.  The figure stepped closer to him then, a slight smile tugging at its lips,"I'm your grandfather Ben, I've come to help you".