guardian angel

X's music is magical

So i not long got out of the shower and it randomly hit me everything my mum said about how I "let" (I didn't let him.. I was too scared, too tented to say no, I really wanted to say no) a guy I didn't even like tough me..

I remember how I felt when she said that, I went upstairs and I wanted to rub bleach in my skin.. Maybe that'd get rid of the dirt.. Feeling that way, feeling so alone, nobody will understand etc, I wish had found out about X sooner.. whenever I think of what happened and what was said, X always makes me feel less alone, he went through a lot, most I can relate to, he brings me comfort, knowing somebody I love so much, look up to, has been through so much most I can relate to that alone brings me so much comfort and I don't feel alone, when it gets too much, when I can't seem to get it out of my head, put on alone part 2

I played some of his music, guardian angel then I played train food, Bruh train food is such a hard hitting song, the pain in his voice is so clear, that song gives me so many goosebumps and makes me cry, I feel like my heart is breaking but in a way it also helps me.. I love that song so much but I can't, I literally can't listen to it all the time, in my opinion its not really a song you can listen to all the time..

X also said when he spoke about his childhood and rape etc on a secret recording "everytime you go to sleep and you remember what you see and you remember how it felt.. and you remember that horrible feeling in your soul.. n-nobody could comfort you"

That stuck with me, well everything he says do tbh

I listened to a few more of his songs like Orlando and arms around you, I cried some more but I also felt like a comfort.. When he said he got his arms wrapped around her and he's gonna make sure nobody harms her, I know he's not gonna let any sicko harm me, he's our guardian angel <3 I then listened to WRA and I do feel a lil better, thankyou X <3