Lyrics

After Taste - Camila

"You were wonderful today Mi Amor" my mom was saying to me as we drove back. I had my eyes closed and was rubbing my temples, trying to get rid of a tension headache.

I sighed, "I did what I always do Mama, dance sexy, sing a bit and make a few goofy jokes." I felt deflated. I wasn't sure if it was the long day or the way I felt about Shawn, but I wasn't ok either way.

"Ay'!" She scolded me, "You don't give yourself credit. You worked so hard. And Shawnito, what a gentleman, he worked so hard too." She mused.

I let out a long breath, "Shawn deserves all the credit. I can't believe...." Tears were escaping me, "I can't believe we just did that..." I sniffed. My mom started rubbing my shoulder reassuringly.

"Mi Amor, you're just tired. You did so much today, you and Shawn made magic!" She said softy, trying to reassure me again.

"I know Mama, but then why do I feel so bad? Why do I feel like I broke him today? Like I broke myself?" The tears falling in a steady stream now.

She didn't say anything, she just carried on rubbing my shoulder and driving. We pulled up to our house ten minutes later, I was still sniffling, tears still making their way down my face when she turned around and looked at me seriously and said in Spanish; 
"That boy did that for you Karla." I knew this was serious the second she used my real name. "He would do anything for you." She qualified, "He understands you, appreciates you, respects you. There's a lot to be said for a man that is willing to wait for the real thing, the one he really loves." Then she gave me an almost scolding look as she said strongly, "Because don't deny it anymore my love, he loves you. And you know that you love him too."

I was shocked, why had my mom never said this to me before, had never given me this speech. I'd stopped crying but my heart was racing, I didn't know what to say in response. She decided to talk again before I could work it out; "Now, you're going to have a nice warm bath to find some calm and centre yourself." She said a bit softer now, "Then I'm going to drive you back to Shawn's place, Andrew told me where he is staying. Then you're going to talk to him. But now, bath and then we go." She said assertively, giving me no room for argument.

I pursed my lips as the last couple of teardrops fell. "Gracias Mama, Te amo"

Twenty minutes later, I was back in the car, feeling refreshed and clear-headed. I had no idea what I was going to say to Shawn, but my mom was right, I couldn't wait until tomorrow, I had to see him now.