𝐒𝐇𝐀𝐃𝐎𝐖𝐒 // 𝐉𝐀𝐌𝐄𝐒 𝐏𝐎𝐓𝐓𝐄𝐑 [𝟏]

Chapter 16

I sat up in my bed, confused as to who was talking so loudly this early in the morning. I was very confused when I saw that I was in my dorm alone before realising that I sleep in my own dorm now. I nearly laughed at how stupid I was being.

The ruckus seemed to be coming from the prefects common room. It couldn't be prefects. It's only 8:00am on a Sunday morning.

People usually sleep in on a Saturday but not me. At the Malfoy Manner you have to be up at 6:00am sharp. Mother goes on and on about being punctual. She says it's unladylike to sleep in which I find absolutely ridiculous.

Even from a young age I was taught to wake up early and now I do without anyone telling me to. I don't mind it anymore really. It's quite nice being up early. I would've been up earlier if it weren't for that party last night. It wasn't even a good party if you ask me.

I got changed into jeans and a sweater and went to check who was making so much noise in the common room.

I opened the door and simultaneously four boys looked directly at me. The Marauders to be specific. They looked like deer caught in headlights.

Remus broke from the trance first and said, "Good Morning Alivia." He smiled warmly before continuing to read the book he had in is hand.

"Morning Remus." I smiled back.

"Oh so he gets to call you Alivia but I still have to call you Malfoy." Potter exclaimed. They were all sitting on the chairs and sofas by the fireplace. Potter was closest to me so he was turned around in his seat. Pettigrew just sort of stared at me and Black glared at me.

"Well unlike you Potter, Remus at least has respect." I nodded in Remus' direction. Remus smirked and Potter just scowled. I made my way to leave but I stopped at the door. "By the way Potter. Only the Heads are allowed in here when there are no meetings being held."

I decided to take a stroll around the grounds. A few students were awake but not many. It was quiet and relaxing. It's refreshing to walk around and admire the architecture of the castle, the landscape, the portraits. Everything. It was all so beautiful.

I sat by the Black Lake to think and clear my head a bit.

What am I doing with my life? After school I'd be forced to become a death eater, marry a man I don't know, and have children. Sometimes it feels like my life isn't even my own. I'm a puppet being controlled by the puppet master. The puppet master being my parents.

I'm scared. Scared for what might happen. Scared for my brother and for Narcissa. Lucius is already fully devoted to becoming a death eater and Narcissa supports their ideals. I know Narcissa at least wouldn't join the Death Eaters. She's not crazy.

I felt a presence next to me and only then did I realise Lucius was sitting next to me.

"Hey Lucius." I looked at him and smiled. He smiled back and we both turned to look at the Black Lake.

"What are thinking about Livvy?" He sounded uncertain. Dazed. He only used Livvy when he wanted to annoy me or he wants upset or concerned about me.

"The future." I answered. I kept my gaze on the Lake but I could feel him looking at me.

"Promise me Liv, that whatever you do," he took a deep breath, "you'll try your best not to get in too deep with the Death Eaters. I want you too be safe."

I sighed and then I smiled. "Lucy. You know I don't want to be a Death Eater but Mother and Father would never let me stay away. They want me to be a Death Eater. What choice do I have?"

Lucius looked troubled. He frowned. "Tell them how Narcissa isn't going to join. Maybe they'll understand then."

I just smiled sadly at Lucius. I put my head on his shoulder and we sat there for the rest of the morning.

I sat down in the back of the library trying my best to hide away from the rest of the world. Unfortunately I could not stay hidden from everyone. Remus managed to find my little spot.

"Oh hi Alivia. I didn't know you were here." Remus spoke.

I looked up and raised my eyebrows at the sound. I smiled once I realised it was him. "No worries Remus. Why don't you join me?" The thing with Remus was that he was calm and collected. If you wanted to hide away forever he could sit there with you and you wouldn't even know it. It's like he's hiding with you but he's not really there until you need him. And he's absolutely fine with that because he understands the need to be hidden.

"Thanks Alivia. How far are you with your essay?" He asked as he set down his books, quill, and paper.

I closed my book and looked up to answer him. "I finished ages ago. I'm doing some light reading at the moment."

"Ah I see. Hiding from the world inside a room filled with so many other worlds." He said with a knowing look in his eye.

I smiled. The way he put that is so beautiful. Hiding from the world while being surrounded by other worlds. At least with these worlds they can be what you want them to be. You get to decide who looks like what, what the setting looks like. You get to sort of imagine the characters as someone more than whose described in the book.

In the real world, you can't do that. People can be cruel or kind, and there is nothing you can do to decide which one they are. You can't imagine all these alternate endings to stories. No it's real. Very real.

Remus pokes my arm and I looked up at him with my eyebrows raised.

"You zoned out there. It's dinner so I thought I'd let you know." He said with a small smile. I only noticed now he had finished his essay and had all his things already packed up. He was about to leave.

I said thank you and packed up my things. I returned the books to their places and chose one to take out to read.

Remus nodded at me and let me go first. My brother would not be happy if I walked into the Great Hall with a Gryffindor. Remus understood that.

That's why I like Remus. He's never judging. He understands whatever you're going through and helps you without really getting involved.

That made me happy. I had a friend who didn't have to get stuck into this mess I'm in. A friend I wasn't forced to have because they're pureblood. I do love Narcissa but she's been my friend since I was 5. Only because our parents wanted us to be friends.

Now I've got a genuine friend that truly cares about me. I was happy. Even if it was only for a little bit.

_____________________________

I've finally updated! Exams have been so stressful. Thank you to everyone who read my story! You guys are amazing.

I've been trying to write more but studying has taken up all my time lately. Exams are nearly over though so I should be able to update more often.

I never thought I'd ever reach 1k reads. Thank you so so much! This story is only just beginning. It's nowhere near finished and I'm excited for when I do finish it. Hopefully it'll be done next year.

– mysticpanda xxx