anonymous

28

The funeral just ended and it was nice to see all of her friends and family. People really did care about her. Once it was over I found the group and they were just standing and talking, and thanking everyone for coming.

"Now what?" Erica asked once we were alone. It still doesn't feel real. I can't believe she's gone. "I think I'm going to go home. I really need to be alone right now." Oliver said and I agreed with him. As much as I love my friends I just want to be alone and just sleep.

"I just got word that the Principal wants us to come in to school right now." Ingrid said as she stared at her phone screen. It probably has something to do with Derrianna. Since the Principal wanted us we had to go to the school.

I sent Colin a sad smile as I helped him walk out the door with everyone else.

-

Remember when I said that I wanted to go home, well now I want to even more. Her locker had candles and cards and things laying all around it. It was a nice thought but it still didn't make me feel better.

"This is bullshit." Ingrid called out and I stared at her. She had every right to be upset right now. She just lost one her best friends. "Half of these people didn't know her or they couldn't stand her. I want to beat asses right now." This is apart of grief.

"It's okay, calm down." Zion softly said as he held her hand. She looked down at it and calmed down.

"Guys," We all turned around to see both Principals smiling sadly at us. I'm so tired of this. "We're in the auditorium." I was the first to move. I careful grabbed Colin to help him walk into the auditorium as everyone followed.

Once we walked in everyone was sitting down wearing dark colors. I mentally shook my head as I found seats in the very back for us. I helped Colin sit down as someone on the stage started to talk. I think her name is Stacey. I barely know her.

"Thank you all for coming. This would have meant a lot to Derrianna to see you all here for her. Your support meant the world to her." I bit my tongue as I waited for Ingrid to do something because we all know that was far from the truth.

"Derrianna was like a sister to me. It pains me to know that I can't spend just one more day with her. She really-"

"This is bullshit!" And there it was. Everyone's head instantly turned to stare at a now highly pissed off Ingrid. "Everything that has came out of your mouth has been a complete lie! Derrianna didn't give a shit about any of you. None of you guys were her friends. You guys only shared classes with her. None of you guys shared or held memories with her like me and these people sitting with me did!"

Everything that Ingrid was saying was true. I was shocked that so many people had the guts to sit here and pretend that she meant something to them when in reality they barely knew her. It was sickening.

"And Stacey, we all know that Derrianna could not stand you." I turned to look at Stacey and she was smirking at Ingrid. "Well what I'm about to say next is something I know for a fact that Derrianna wanted." I furrowed my eyebrows and thought about it. What would she have wanted except to kill Stacey?

"Derrianna wanted the schools to be divided, just like it was before. So we officially declare war upon ValleyHigh." What the fuck?! How is this possible? The whole auditorium went absolutely crazy as everyone started to scream and shout.

"You guys are the reason why we lost 3 of our students," This is crazy. I couldn't take anymore so I stood up causing everyone else to do the same and I walked out of the auditorium as Stacey continued to talk and everyone else continued to go crazy. Once everyone was in the hallway I started to pace due to my nerves. What's going to happen to us?

"This is crazy, they can't do that." Noah stressed out and I continued to pace. "They already did." Oliver said which made me stop completely and look at them. We've been through this before, but now they're really mad because someone is dead. I don't think they're going to hold back this time.

"I need to go back in there and beat her boney ass!" Ingrid cried out as she tried to go back in, but Oliver and Zion stopped her. I'm trying to convince myself that everything is going to be fine but my body and mind won't believe me. I feel like I'm going to die. I looked around the hallway as they continued to talk, but I wasn't listening. The lockers made me feel sick. The tile floor made me feel sick. This whole place was making me feel sick.

"I really need to go home." Everyone instantly stopped talking and stared at me. I started to get really hot the more I stood here. "Is everything okay-"

"No! I can't be here anymore! I just can't!" I yelled out and everyone backed away from me. I turned away from them and headed towards the main exit. I just really want to be at home right now.

-

I closed the front door behind me and got ready to walk up the stairs but a voice stopped me. I let out a small breath and followed the voice to the kitchen to find my Mom and Dad sitting at the dining room talking. They still had on their funeral outfits which meant they just got home not too long ago.

"You okay?" My Dad asked me as I stood in the kitchen entrance. I didn't want to sit with them. I didn't want to talk to them. I just wanted to go to my room and sleep. And then if I feel better tomorrow I'll talk to them. I just can't right now.

"Um yeah, I just came from the school and I'm kind of tired so I'm going to head to bed." My Mom's face made a frown and I instantly started to feel bad. I promise I'll talk to them tomorrow. I just really need to be alone right now.

"Are you sure? I can cook you something and we can talk about what's going on?" She kindly suggested and I smiled at the both of them and shook my head. "No thanks I'm just really tired. I'll see you guys in the morning." And with that I started to walk to my room.

Once I closed and locked the door I kicked off my shoes and looked at my room. Everything reminded me of her. I know that we weren't friends, but this still affects me. One of the last things I said to her was something rude about her Dad. I didn't mean it, but I never told her that. I never said sorry to her.

The tears formed in my eyes as I thought more about how I hurt her. I can never take it back now. She's dead and now I have no way of telling her that I appreciated her and that I was really sorry. I picked up the first thing that I saw and threw it thinking more about it. And then I just couldn't stop. I was crying and throwing stuff. I just wish that I could go back and redo everything.