[Completed]
"It started out not too badly. I thought that I could be a bit more confident if I lost a few pounds, but that soon spiralled out of control. I forgot who I was and what I liked to do. I didn't have any energy to pursue anything that I...
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Long story short, Jin had been excited for nothing.
His enthusiasm had hit an all time low when he had received the line distribution sheet.
Three lines. How much practice would these need?
What was the point of being really good at the dance if he only got to be center for ten seconds?
He moodily shifted his weight from one foot to the other as he worked out with Jungkook and Jimin. The two maknaes were adamant that they needed the perfect bodies for this comeback, and Jin had agreed halfheartedly to accompany them.
However, he hadn't expected to drown in his negative emotions like this.
Jin was a rag doll who was forced by the company to sing whatever they told him to. If he wanted to release a cover on SoundCloud, he had to ask the others a thousand times if it was good enough, or else risk his entire reputation. But the main songs, oh no, he had little to no input. He was given the line distribution sheet and expected to follow it and be okay with it.
But he wasn't okay with it. He hated being treated like he was on a lower level than the members.
He hated that feeling of not being in control. It's as if his whole life was being controlled by someone else, and not listening to his pleads for more lines and center parts.
"I don't want to lift weights anymore," Jin said to the others.
Jungkook and Jimin looked at him quizzically.
"Why? Do you feel sick?"
Shaking his head, Jin headed over to the treadmills. The two maknaes got the hint and, with huge smiles on their faces, raced each other to get the one next to the eldest. As usual, Jungkook won, leaving Jimin as a pouting mess.
These kind of games were played by the maknaes quite often, but for once Jin didn't pay any attention to them. His thoughts were scattered. Like little threads discarded from a shirt, they lay jumbled up in random directions. He decided to turn up the speed on his treadmill so he could run faster. The loud smacks of his feet hitting the treadmill drowned out his negative emotions. Jimin and Jungkook watched him in admiration, but started telling him to slow down after a while.
When would they understand that the actions you do out of anger and frustration are more passionate than any other action?
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Everybody else was very hyped about their new song. Namjoon proposed that they all celebrate with takeout from Panda Express, an idea that Tae was enthusiastic for.
Jin requested that his portion be a little smaller than the others, but Jungkook refused, "Hyung it's okay if you cheat on your diet for one day."
But it wasn't okay.
He picked excessively at the Kung Pao Chicken that the maknaes had forced him to get. The spicy food which normally made him happy was burning his mouth and causing him to tear up. Jin, the hearty eater, couldn't wait until dinner time was over.
