Long Distance Love Letters

Frightening Apprehension

The next several weeks were devotedly spent in planning mode. The board meeting to discuss the details of the new schooling situation was scheduled for September 1st and the Avonlea's Women Advocates, as Diana had cleverly named them, were determined to have their plan organized by then with time to spare.

Anne had become the unspoken leader of the revolt, overseeing everyone's method of preparation and inputing her advice whenever necessary. Though she would never admit it, she did enjoy being part of an organized action such as this again. The last one she had taken part in was to try and convince the president of Queen's to allow the library to be open 24 hours a day. Given that these circumstances offered a much greater offense, Anne often stayed awake late into the night sitting at the dining room table with a few candles and a cup of tea imagining all of the possible outcomes of her plan.

Gilbert offered his help as much as possible and spread the word wherever he could, but his long hours at the hospital often made him return home quite late at night. Silently, he felt incredibly guilty that he could not be of more use, despite Anne's reassurance that he was already doing a lot for them. On the nights that he would come home to find his wife sitting at their cluttered dining room table with a candle lightly dimming the area, he would kiss her in greeting before offering his help. Occasionally she would accept, but most nights found her gifting him a smile and thanking him for offering his help, but that he deserved some rest and she would fill him in in the morning, all while rubbing her stomach.

It was those nights that Gilbert would lay awake in the empty bed for what would seem like an eternity, waiting for Anne to come join him.

However, she typically would not come until after he had fallen into a fitful sleep.

•••

Anne stifled a yawn as she took a sip of coffee, glancing around at her disheveled kitchen. Everyone in the AWA was over and they were deep into the construction phase of their plan. Scattered around the kitchen, old tablecloths were being used as drop cloths so as not to get paint on the floor, an accident that would be much to Gilbert's exasperation. Everyone sat around the drop cloths, painting their assigned board, chatting away about their revolt as well as casual affairs.

"Anne, how's pregnancy going?" Muriel asked from across the table, adding to such pleasantries.

Anne smiled and shrugged, dipping her paintbrush back into their shared bowl of red paint.

"It's been much smoother since returning to Avonlea. I've come to believe that being in a foreign environment such as Summerside was taking quite the toll on me all around."

"Yes, I can imagine. I had somewhat of a similar scare when I was pregnant."

"With Matthew?"

Muriel shook her head. "No, before him, actually. Back when I was still married to Jonah. My pregnancy was ectopic at the beginning. I was lucky that it resolved on its own."

"I thought Matthew was your first child," Anne wondered, a bit confused.

Muriel sighed somberly. "He is. Jonah and I ended up losing the baby a few months later."

An icy wave of fear shot down Anne's spine as she digested what her former teacher said.

"I'm sorry," she managed to get out for professional curtesy.

She spent the rest of the rendezvous in complete and utter silence.

•••

Gilbert miraculously managed to get home at a reasonable time that night. The sun had just finished setting as he entered his home. He glanced around the kitchen, smiling at the sight of the paint-covered tablecloths that Anne never put away.

"I'm home!" he called as he took off his coat. He was confused to receive no response.

"Anne?" he tried. Still no response.

Concerned, he quietly trekked through the house. He eventually found Anne laying on the couch and reading a book by their lit fireplace. As he approached, he noticed that she was crying.

"Anne?" he asked nervously.

Her gaze snapped up to meet his. She quickly wiped her tears away. "Oh, hey, Gil. I must not have heard you come in. How...how was work?"

"What's wrong?" he asked, ignoring her question as he sat down next to her. He recognized the book she was reading to be The Language of Flowers, the book that used to belong to her parents.

Anne breathed an unconvincing laugh and put her hand on his. "It's nothing. Just my uncontrollable hormones getting the better of me."

Gilbert squeezed her hand. "I'm your husband and you don't think I know when you're lying?"

She looked at him for a moment before sighing and running a hand over her face. "It's just something that Muriel said that I've been overthinking."

"My Anne?" he asked in faux-disbelief. "Overthinking?"

Anne cracked a smile before sadness took over again. "She said that she had complications with her first pregnancy like I did." Her voice became choked up. "She lost that baby."

Gilbert closed his eyes and exhaled as Anne began crying again. He scooted over and wrapped his arms around her and gently pulled her into his embrace. He rubbed her back as she cried into his chest.

"What if it's a sign?" she sobbed. "I've always been afraid that we were destined to lose our sweet little one. What if we are?"

"Anne," he soothed, smoothing her hair. "I have the same fear you do."

She looked up at him, strands of hair sticking to her wet, blotchy cheeks. "Really?"

"Of course." He pushed her hair away from her face. "I've been afraid to let you out of my sight ever since Summerside. Often at night, I'll lay my hand on your stomach and won't move until I feel a kick."

Anne nodded. "Me, too."

He kissed her forehead. "But it's not healthy for us to live in this constant fear. We have to believe that our child inherited your strength and resilience."

Finally, a small smile appeared on his wife's face and she rested her head on his shoulder. "Thank you, but all the strength would be coming from you."

Gilbert smiled and decided not to argue with her. "So how did your AWA meeting go today?"

Anne smirked. "We're going to destroy those totalitarians."

———
AN: ok three things:
1. i'm so so sorry this update took so long!!! i'll think of an excuse at some point lol
2. so i'm graduating tonight

that's wild
3. 100k reads??? that's insane!! i love you all so so much!!!!!!