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Go on, go on, go bravely on, into the darkest night. – Claire Wyndham: My Love Will Never Die
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It’s the day of the funeral. Thandeka has been so scarce I think I’ve seen her twice since Sunday. Vuyo told me just how Khwezi and TDK were close. He said when her parents disowned her she stayed with them for a couple of weeks till she found an apartment. My C-HR was delivered yesterday and Vuyo wasn’t pleased at first but he soon warmed up, it is personalized YEYEYE 3 (my inner diva does flip backs when I think about it, it gives that inner boost that a person needs every once in a while). I told him about the chat Sizwe and I had and he simply said ‘I have to pay lobola soon so that he won’t complain about you staying here’. Vuyo though.
Anyways we are both getting dressed for the funeral. Londy volunteered on keeping an eye on the twins but if I didn’t know better I’d say she is going somewhere and she is using the twins as a shield so that I don’t ask too many questions. We finish getting dressed and I fix his tie. He stares at me.
Me: “you are starring.”
Him: “I am just remembering this crazy moment where Khwezi brought Thandeka home and they were both equally drunk. The way they were singing yoh. They sang a gospel song, ukuth how they knew it because they have never been to church before Angazi. They kept on repeating the chorus ‘ngoba nguye owangifela langilahlwe okwempela naluthando olwangifela umhlobo wami’.” OMG he has such an angelic voice, I will beg him to sing for me some other time.
“It’s a song by Hlengiwe Mhlaba Sewakhile by the way. They even preached that night. They said even when they are drunk, they know God will never forsake them. He has a place in their hearts and they love him. Yoh Khwezi was such a character shame. She used to say ‘Bhuti I wish that you can find a woman who will love you and respect you for who you are and not for what you have.’ She spoke sense yena. She was a smart young woman.”
Me: “she asked to be my bridesmaid in our wedding.” He chuckles.
Him: “kufana naye.”
Me: “she was glad that you found a woman like me. I really don’t know how she was able to observe the type of a woman I am without knowing me for long.”
Him: “you are an amazing, wonderful, kindhearted woman. Your aura speaks for yourself. One does not even need a whole year to determine what a good person you are. Plus you have that kind of smile that is not fake, a genuine one.” Wow I am speechless. I just smile and hug him. He breaks the hug. “Let’s go before siba late.”
We go downstairs, eat breakfast and head out. He is driving the Royce today. This car has that thing of making you feel like iskhulu guys you don’t understand.
NARRATED
The funeral service starts with a prayer. Speakers make their way to the front, paying tribute to the fallen flower. They speak so nicely of Khwezi and they don’t shy away from pointing out her flaws. The program proceeds peacefully. The pastor starts the closing prayer and in the middle of it bikes’ sounds are heard coming from outside the church. Not just one but many bikes. Also sounds of exhaust pipes are heard. The pastor finishes and the coffin is escorted outside, everybody follows it. They are not even singing because the singing will be overpowered by the mechanic sounds. Outside there are bikes, lots of them and VW cars from Citi Golf, GTI, Golf 7, you name them. Every Hunter is wearing all black with either combat boots, black heels, black sneakers. They are all wearing designer masks that cover their whole faces.
The Lioness stands on top of her bike. She is wearing a black turtle neck, black slim fitted stretch combat pants and combat boots. She is wearing a knee length black coat and black leather gloves. She has a bald head with a lioness tattoo. On her right hand she is carrying a black pistol and on her left hand she is carrying a hammer. She shouts “INTSHIZA ESANDLENI ISANDO ESANDLENI! (GUN ON THE HAND, HAMMER ON THE HAND!)” Every gang member shout the same multiple times before the exhaust pipes start again.
4 muscle men from the gang step forward to take Khwezi’s casket and go to put it in a Rover hearse. Every gang member gets into their cars and bikes and heard to the cemetery. The civilians follow behind in their cars. They arrive at the cemetery and Khwezi’s casket is placed on top of the grave. The civilians sit on the tents and wait for the cemetery farewell to begin. The pastor start and finishes with a prayer.
Before the casket is lowered to the ground The Lioness makes her way to it carrying the hammer sledge and a bottle of Glenfiddich 15. T-bone and Cleopatra follows slightly behind her. She squats in front of the casket and opens it. She opens the scotch, takes a sip, closes it and put it inside the casket together with the hammer. She whispers to Khwezi “Save me a seat where you are going friend, goodnight.”😢 After that she closes the casket. The casket lowers to the ground and she turns. She withdraws her pistol from her waist and starts shooting at the sky with her back against the grave, all the gang members follows pursuit. After they are done they get into the cars and bikes and start making huge sounds, engines roaring and the sound of a roaring lion is heard playing from the cars.
After everything is done people head back to Khwezi’s home for refreshments. There are whispers about the gangsters’ stunt and some are confirming their suspicions about Khwezi being a gangster. Some are fantasizing about being in a gang, some are talking about the cars and bikes. Most elders are shocked. Khwezi’s family is embarrassed that even in death their daughter continues being rebellious with her gangster shit. The Hunters go to change their outfits and also head to Khwezi’s home.
LWANDEKA
I head to tent that has the catering company to lend a helping hand leaving Vuyo chatting with Soma near his car. They are more than happy to receive my help. We serve the people in the marque and others sitting outside it. I also take two plates and go to serve Vuyo and Soma. I find them chatting with Thandeka. I bow a little and give them their food.
Me: “nina bantu basemzini.” Soma laughs and Vuyo chuckles.
TDK: “makoti wenana.” She laughs. I was keen on seeing her in action today as a gangster but I couldn’t identify her with the masks they were wearing. I must say her gang consists of so many members.
Vuyo: “thanks for the food MaSthole.”
Me: “uphazamile baba kusawu MaMnguni. Azikho ezisangene esibayeni sikababa. (You are mistaken baba it is still MaMnguni. My father haven’t received cows or the bride price.)” He stares at me sternly.
Vuyo: “well then tell Mnguni to expect visitors from the Sithole family soon.” He states in a serious tone.
Me: “I am joking babe. There is no rush, right?” aibo sekayi jukebox yin lo udlaliswa ngemali?
Vuyo: “well I am not joking.” Yoh kanti banjani abantwana bakweminye imizi. Abadlaliswa?
TDK: “why the serious talk nina? Yoh you can be boring sometimes.” Both her and Soma laughs.
Me: “so are you going to eat standing or you are going to move to the marque?”
Soma: “we are fine here makoti. We don’t want the township girls throwing themselves at us.” TDK and I laugh.
Vuyo: “when are you going to eat?”
Me: “I don’t have an appetite babe.”
Him: “maybe you will have one if I feed you.” I blush.
Soma: “we are in a funeral for god sake. Don’t be all lovey dovey, nizodlula.” We all laugh at him.
TDK and I head back to the tent and finish serving people. We also distribute drinks and after that I take a 1l juice to Vuyo and Soma. They hand me the empty plates and I hand them the juice. After eating and drinking people starts leaving. I also go outside and meet Nolby on my way to Vuyo.
Me: “the way you are moving up and down one would swear you are trying to score points or something.” She laughs.
Nolby: “mara you know ngikhuthele and ngiyathumeka. Why ube so?”
Me: “angilwi.” We both laugh. “I think I saw Fortunate somewhere or was I dreaming?”
Her: “she was here but she left early. Apparently her babysitter had a family emergency so she had to rush to her baby.”
Me: “she has a child?”
Her: “yeah, a 4 year old.”
Me: “how well do you know these people mngani?”
Her: “mngan I am from around so I met Thandeka at the club together with Fortunate and Khwezi. We hit it off there because we had two things in common. Independence and our love for booze. We are not that close like you and I but we do have some sort of a relationship.”
Me: “I hear you.” We arrive to Vuyo and Soma and find them chatting with two girls who are clearly flirting with them. “Baby I’m cold.” He takes off his coat and make me wear it, like literally put it in me.
Him: “you look so cute in it.” I giggle. He plants a kiss in my nose and I blush.
Me: “when are we leaving?”
Him: “we were waiting for you actually.”
Girl 1: “but we were still chatting guys.” Girl awuzibeki vele uyathanda ukuziveza, uthanda ukugqama?
Soma: “well ladies whatever we were talking about is not that important that we would postpone our departure. It’s not like you had a business proposal for us.” Nolby laughs her ass off.
Girl 2: “but we were vibing Jobe before we were rudely disturbed, weren’t we?” she says with so much attitude. I have no energy to even form a cheeky response in my head. I just roll my eyes.
Nolby: “tchin lamantombi akwelilokishi anjani kanti?” she asks still laughing.
Vuyo: “see you tomorrow Soma and Nolubabalo I think we are still on for Friday so see you then.” We say our goodbyes to our friends and get into the car completely ignoring the township divas.
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#RIPKhwezi
#GoodNightFriend
#LongLiveSando 🕊🕊🕊
