Songs for this chapter:
Settle down by The 1975
Yaz
The past week, Harry and I didn't speak at all. Jay had his little play date with this adorable girl. I just had to pick on him, it was funny when his face got all red. Harry and I just shared little glances at each, well if you can even call them glances. He wouldn't look me straight in the eyes. That did hurt,but the more he cant stand me, the more distant he would be, than there wouldn't be a slight chance for us to get together. This is really hard on me since I want him so much. I mean, I could tell Harry the easy way, but if he knew what my intentions are, he would be in-denial that I'm a fucked up person, and try to convince that I am good for him.
Jay didn't have summer all this week, so Harry was around more. I stayed in my room most of the time while he was here, since I didn't want to make things more awkward between him, and I. But I really want to see his beautiful face, even if it was only for a second. He probably have forgotten about me, and moved on with someone else. I hope out of all the people it wasn't Hollie.
I literally despise her. She had done some messed up shit to me in the past. But the main one was her telling everyone in our entire class of 7th graders that I was bipolar, and was taking meds for it. I was bullied tell the end of 8th grade. But that didn't stop me from being her friend, since i was wanted friends being how young I was; I barely had any. But she stooped all of the sudden at the end of 7th grade. She thought I was to "depressed", and decided not to be friends with me anymore, then started bullying me, just like the others. Dispite that I knew all of her secrets, I didn't tell anyone, and they were some pretty fucked up ones.
I shouldve gotten back at her by doing so, but that would have made me has shady has she is. Hollie doesn't deserve Harry. I don't know why he even has sex with someone like that.
It was Friday, and I had nothing else to do. I wanted to call Zodie to see what he was up to, but he hadn't called at all since last Sunday when we hooked up. He was probably busy I thought to myself as I got up out of bed. I walked downstairs quietly to see if Harry was in the living room. I didn't see him, I hurried my steps to the kitchen to get a glass of water.
There was no sign of him,and Jay, I poured me a glass of water from the tap. Putting the glass to my mouth I looked out the blinds to my back yard to see Harry, and Jay making dirt balls. I laughed to myself, their hands were all dirty with mud. Harry had a smudge of dirt on his cheek, and some on his forehead. I had to stop myself from going out, and wiping it off of him. He looked so adorable, with his curls in-front of his face, the chili weather causing his cheeks, lips, and nose to be a lighter pink. His dimples were showing as he laughed at Jay putting mud in his mouth. I wasn't surprised that boy loved any kind of dirt.
Harry shook his head when Jay offered him some. They begin to draw-faces on the dirt balls with sticks, I begin to laugh at their childish behavior as I sipped on my water. I closed the blinds before Harry see's me.
I walked upstairs to my room, before he comes back inside, I been trying to avoid those green eyes of his lately. Last time I looked at them they didn't seem as bright, and I wonder is that because of me. God I hope its not.
I lay-ed on my bed looking at the ceiling. My phone rang, heart out by The 1975 almost most gave me a heart attack. I put my hand on my chest, trying to control my fast beating heart. I smiled to myself as I saw who was calling me.
"Hello" I smiled.
"Hey want to hang out" Zodie spoke his voice loud over some music.
"Sure" I answered, hearing his breathing decrease, what was he doing.
"Alright I'll pick you up in about an hour or so" he told me as he hung up. I got out of bed deciding to brush my teeth,and comb my hair. I would straight it, but I was just to lazy. I was just pulling up my jeans when I heard a knock on the door. I mumbled a come in as I quickly tried to put my shirt on. But the failed when Harry walked in with my shirt half way on. He looked down, as he shook his head, mumbling a sorry.
"Its all good what do you need" I finished putting my shirt on. I began to put my shoes on when he started speaking.
"I was just gonna tell you that I'm taking Jay to the park." Harry spoke his face still a light shade of pink. I nodded my head, once I was done putting my shoes on.
"Okay". Harry stood for a few seconds, it looked like he had something on his mind, but he just shook his head in headed out the door.
Harry
Its still on my mind. I don't know what to do. I want to know why Yaz mom was putting pills in her food that she didn't know about.. Its just strange to me. What was so wrong with Yaz that her mom had to put stuff in her food that she didn't know about. Its just so weird to me. I want to talk to Yaz about it, but then I would just seem nosy, and its not like she would tell me anyway, since she is so closed off. But something about what Holly told me just didn't make since. It didn't add up.
Some of the stuff she told me, matched to Yaz weird behavior lately. We could be the best of friends, laughing, and talking to one another, then the next minute shes yelling at me saying I'm a waste of her time. That is probably a sign that shes bipolar.
My head begin to hurt as I walked down the stairs, to a dressed Jay with his super man cap on.I was going to take him to go on a play date with Violet again. He seemed really happy around her, always blushing and smiling.
"Ready" I asked him. He nodded running towards the door, his hair going up and down.
My head begin to hurt even more as I wanted for Jay to buckle up. I sighed as I started the engine, but I was interrupted my a soft voice.
"Harry are you alright" Jay soft voice whispered. I looked at him through my rear view mirror his big blue eyes staring back at me.
"Yea just a head ache" I sighed backing out of the drive way.
"Are you sad about my sister" he asked looking out the window. I didn't know what to say to him.
"Yea" I gave in looking at the big blue eyes that starred back at me.
"I can give you some advice" he suggested. I chuckled as I couldn't believe that I was going to get advice from 9 year old. I nodded my head for him to continue.
"Well Yazmin likes chocolate, you can buy her some chocolate" He spoke from the back seat. Not a bad idea, but how can I do that if she doesn't even want to talk to me.
"Uhm.. its not that, she just doesn't want to talk to me" I told the blonde haired kid in my back seat.
"Women" he spoke under his breath before continuing.
"My sister is a very complicated human being" his small voice spoke in the most mature way. I nodded my head agreeing with him.
"I think she just wants someone that shows they care for her, like shes wanted" His squeaky voice rang in my ears. I was surprised at his choice of words. He was right in the sense, Yaz does need that special attention, but every time I try it works for a while, then it starts all over again. Her yelling, my yelling, then its back at square one where we hate each other.
"Its not that easy as it seems" I told him.
"Just give it some time" He told me as he looked at me with a smile.
"I hope your Right bud" I spoke as pulled up to the park. That might have been the best advice from anyone, let alone a 9 year old.
SORRY FOR THE WAIT LOVES
-A R T I E
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My Brother's Babysitter (Harry Styles Fanfic)
Fanfiction"My biggest fear is that eventually you will see me the way I see myself" This book contains: sexual assault, sexual content, profanity,and drug abuse.
