Casual Sabotage

8 - Come a little closer to the flame

It got warmer outside, the snow melted, the flowers started to bloom, Ian and Mickey started to spend time at their building again and Ian became more and more unhappy.

When they were at the building, spending the night there, or lying on the mattress cooling down after sex, smoking and talking and kissing and cuddling, it was like they were in a whole other world. It was a small piece of heaven and both of them were incredibly happy just existing here together.

But outside of it... it was different.

On a Tuesday, Ian and Mickey once walked down the streets at night from the building to their house. No one was around, not one soul, not even car drove by in the last 15 minutes. Ian took a small breath and then took Mickey's hand gently, to hold it while they were walking. Ian counted the seconds – one, two, three, fou- and Mickey pulled his hand away, put both of them into his pockets and quickly looked up and down the road to see if someone had seen them.

On a Thursday, a week later, Ian found out that he passed his algebra exam (he was about to finish school), he was happy and danced around Mickey in the store cheering. Mickey smiled at him lovingly and Ian, in his happiness, forgot where they were for a moment, cupped Mickey's cheek and kissed his lips. Mickey quickly pushed him away so hard, that Ian crashed into the shelf behind him, and it almost fell over. At least two of the customers came walking towards them to check what was going on, Mickey quickly wiped his arm over his mouth – Ian had never hated a gesture as much as this one.

It then all got too much for Ian on the day of his graduation. He had invited Mickey to the party his siblings organised for him and Mickey had promised to show up. But he promised this, before the two incidences (and they were just two examples in a row of many other related events) of the hand holding and kissing.

The party was in full blast, his family, his friends, some of the guys from ROTC and also Mandy were all here. They were drinking and dancing and celebrating their graduation (since mandy and some of the friends graduated together with Ian) ... just Mickey didn't show up yet.

Ian was disappointed beyond belief. How could Mickey just forget this day? He secretly left the house and sat outside on the steps to the porch, looking at his phone. If Mickey would at least texted him... came up with some excuse... but nothing. He wanted to text him and ask him where he was when the door behind him opened again. Ian turned around and saw Mandy, who smiled at him compassionately and held two drinks in her hand. She sat down next to Ian.

"He won't come, you know", she said.
Ian sighed and took one of the drinks from her.
"But why? He promised me to come."
"Well, he said...", she rubbed her arm and looked down, "He said, you were losing control over yourself lately, especially when you two are here in front of your siblings. And now, that there are even more people and strangers here, he didn't want to risk it. I guess he's afraid you're gonna out him."

Ian clenched his jaw and then angrily threw the cup in his hands to the ground.
"Since when is Mickey fucking Milkovich such a damn little pussy?", he yelled.
Mandy looked at him with wide eyes and quickly looked around if someone heard him while shushing him.

"Hey, I'm on your side. But being afraid of our dad isn't necessarily the dumbest thing."
"So? He could have at least texted me! He's such a fucking coward", he shook his head, "You know, if he doesn't feel like he has to come, maybe I'll get so drunk I forget I have a boyfriend and instead make out with Paul, let's see how much he likes that!", he said and was about to storm back inside.
"If you do that, Mickey will kill Paul and beat you up before breaking up with you, you do know that, right?"
"He wouldn't beat me up."
"If you cheat on him, you bet he will. But it definitely won't make him come out."
Ian scoffed, "Why do I have to behave like I have a boyfriend the entire time, while my boyfriend doesn't?"
Mandy stood up and shrugged, "You were the one stupid enough to fall in love with my brother."
"Well, if he keeps it up, who knows for how long I will still be in love with him.", Ian stated coldly and went inside.