Petrichor

♡︎𝓽᭙ꫀꪀ𝓽ꪗ ꪀ𝓲ꪀꫀ♡︎

༒

   I sit on the grass in the courtyard with a cigarette in my hand. It is midnight, Draco and I slept through dinner. He's probably still sleeping; he was sleeping when I left him.

I stare out at the midnight sky, letting my mind wander. I let my mind wander from Draco to my parents.

☔︎︎☔︎︎☔︎︎☔︎︎☔︎︎☔︎︎☔︎︎☔︎︎☔︎︎☔︎︎☔︎︎☔︎︎☔︎︎☔︎︎☔︎︎☔︎︎☔︎︎☔︎︎☔︎︎☔︎︎
I sit on the end of the stairs with my stuffed animal in my hands. My small, five year old hands touch the button of eyes. I smile down at the pink and pastel purple rabbit as I flop it's long ears around.

"What do you mean you have to go?"

My mother asks aggressively as she slaps my father's brief case out of his hand.

My smile drops. I look up from my bunny to the wall that is shielding my vision from my mother and father.

"Avaline, I have to go to work. You're drunk, you're going mad."

He says, his voice emotionless and annoyed.

They begin to shout at each other, causing me to peak out my head from the corner of the wall. I stare at them while they exchange words that husband and wife shouldn't exchange.

"Can't you just be home for once?!"

My mum yells, her words passing by the end of her throat.

"No, Avaline, I have to get to work."

My father says with a sigh as he picks up the brief case.

"Carmen is always alone because of you. Can't you be a good father to her for once?"

My mother asks.

"She's not alone because of me, Avaline. She's alone because you ignore her. You pay all of your attention to Cyrus, not enough to Carmen.

My mother runs her hands across her mouth as she looks down, tears in her eyes. My father begins to spit out some random bullshit, causing my mother to yell again. The yelling becomes too overwhelming. It feels like a bunch of knife are going through my ears.

I cover my ears with my hands as I walk up the stairs, towards my room.
☔︎︎☔︎︎☔︎︎☔︎︎☔︎︎☔︎︎☔︎︎☔︎︎☔︎︎☔︎︎☔︎︎☔︎︎☔︎︎☔︎︎☔︎︎☔︎︎☔︎︎☔︎︎☔︎︎☔︎︎

I look down to my half burnt cigarette.

How long have I been thinking?

I wipe my tears away with my finger as I stand up, not wanting to do this anymore.

"Carmen?"

I hear Draco call out as he walks near me.

"I'm here."

I reply as I stand up and walk towards him.

I grab his hand and begin to walk back inside. He is slightly confused, but I have a plan.

"What are you doing?"

He asks as we walk up the stairs.

"Do you want to fuck me again or not?"

I ask as we walk up the stairs.

He just stares at me and says nothing. Isn't this what he wants? Because this is what I want for now, I can't be too close to him. I just need to fuck him one last time and leave, that's it.