control || beth x benny

𝟎𝟐. New Jersey

"So, let me get this straight: after months without talking to him, you decided to call and when he picked up it was a girl talking?" Jolene was trying to not laugh, once again. "Girl, you know what they say: lucky in the game, unlucky in love."

I rolled my eyes as I let my body slide from the wall to the floor.

" Why this emotions thing is so complicated? I'm feeling so embarrassed right now, Jolene." I mumbled. "I just want to forget this."

" You won't drink again." She interrupted. "Go play your nerdy game or something but stay away from liquids but water and orange and apple juice."

I looked at the ceiling, sighing. I'm feeling ridiculous. I'm the Chess world champion and here I am, letting the guilt eating me up. A stupid guilt, a meaningless guilt. I should know how to manage my feelings. I'm not 15 anymore.

" You're right. I guess I will train and start to look for some tournaments until US Champion begins."

"That's my girl. Go eat them baby. " Her motivation makes me always happy.

"Bye Jolene."

After turning off the phone, I analyzed my living room. For a minute, I felt a breeze of emotions by looking at my "mom's" piano. I miss her so much. I miss her around me, I miss arrive home late and hear her favorite tv show. I know she's in a better place now.

Firstly, I started by decluttering my new bookshelf, organizing the books by number of pages. Ironically, nowadays I can't handle work in a messy place. After that, I threw some old stuff out and finally, I did some pancakes and suck my head in chess table.

...

Looking at my watch, I noticed how late it was. Already 2 A.M. When I was getting up, I saw the magazine on the floor. After picking it up, I looked at tournaments section. The US Open Championship will start on October 26th. Before that, I could sign up for... New York or Chicago.

Oh well, definitely New York never sounded so good in my ears like now. No, I don't have any hope to see Benny even knowing he lives there. He travels around the world, it would be a huge coincidence if we met there. Or maybe I just want to see him again and well, if he asks me why New York, I can just say that I misread and instead of New York, I thought it was New Jersey.

I'm really bad with plans.