What Should Have Been From The Beginning

A New Beginning

I stood with my head in his chest, feeling every single heartbeat that filled his cavity. I was exactly where I wanted to be, with him. Being so close that I could practically taste his aftershave that he was soaked in. Having sensations run down my back as his hand dropped further and further down my body. We still though we're in the middle of a church. The church that he had been about to marry another woman in. But he didn't. He came back to me and I knew right there and then, gathered in his arms and feeling his hand stroke over my hair, that I had him for real and there was nothing about to make me let him go again.

I pulled away reluctantly and looked up into his eyes, mesmerised by the blue hue they had to them and enchanted by the way he looked into our future through mine. I asked,

'What the heck do we do now? Where do we go?'

I sensed mine and his fingers locking together and he pulled my hand up to his mouth and placed a soft kiss onto my skin.

'We can go wherever you want and do whatever you want. I'm with you. Forever.'

He revealed a smile and his perfect, pristine teeth were visible. In that moment, all I could think about was Lake Como. That dream I had where we were wrapped up in the sheets and each other. He was feeding me croissants and our eyes switched from gazing upon the lake and each other. I wanted to be away with him, alone. I wanted to not have to worry about what other people where going to say about the chaos I had just created. I needed his love and affection along with privacy and intimacy. Whilst I was still stuck attached to his eyes, I knew what I wanted and where I wanted it to be.

'Well in that case,' I took a short pause and giggled under my breathe knowing that what I was about to say was going to shock him too, 'I want to fly to Italy and I want you to make love to me like you never have before. I want to have a weekend of pure romance and bliss and I want to lay in bed all day with you and talk about anything and everything.'

I thought to myself, 'Meredith Grey. This is not like you at all.' I had never been one for all the 'romancey', loved up stuff but clearly I was a changed woman and I knew that because I would not have just ruined a wedding. Yes, I might always get what I want and work for it but I would never have done that for anyone else. Just Derek and only Derek. I wanted it to just be us with no interruptions or worries. I watched his face light up as I spoke and I heard a reply I really wanted to hear.

'I want everything that you just said. And more. I know what we are going to do,' he said with an excited expression, 'we are gonna go to your house, I'm going to book us flights to Italy whilst you pack and we will be on the earliest flight. Where in Italy?'

I told him exactly where and we both walked out from our past lives, hand in hand, ready for our future together. Our life together filled with everything we ever wanted from each other. I knew, just from having him in my arms again, that I was ready to start our relationship from the beginning. We would have conversations like we had just met. We would kiss again for the first time. I wanted a new beginning and I wanted it to be with him.

We arrived at my house, after a car journey engulfed with smiles and laughs, sincere words and meaningful touches on my thigh. I climbed out of the car, as did he, he held his hand on my back when we were walking to the front door and as soon as we stepped foot inside, he reminisced.

'Meredith, do you know the last time I was stood in this doorway, I grabbed you by the waist and we were swaying to one of our songs? Your hair smelt like Lavender and you were sick. But you still looked amazing and god, that ratty Dartmouth t-shirt with the hole in the left shoulder, looked so good on you.'

I slowly, temptingly walked up to him and stood centimetres from his face. The sexual tension was at a high and all I wanted to do was rip his suit off and never let go. I teased him by slowly leaning forward and placing a gentle kiss on his lips, making him want more as I moved away with my back towards him and felt his eyes piercing through the back of me. Still with my back to him I replied,

'Yes Derek. I do remember. But what I don't recall is the part where you swept me off my feet and carried me upstairs, took off my shirt, kissed my neck and let me entertain you.'

He just stared at me with those eyes. At first sight I saw puppy dog eyes like he was so in love with me and then I saw the demanding side of him. The side that I had only seen once, when we were in the skills lab. I turned around and witnessed him move his hands down to his trousers, unbutton them and then begin to unbutton his blazer. He wasn't going to get me. He had to wait.

'I don't think so.' I said to him, knowing he would be confused and pissed at me for making him wait. 'You need to book those flights to Italy and then we can catch up with each other.'

'God, please tell me you're joking.'

I didn't answer but instead went into the kitchen to make a drink and pointed him to the office where the computer was.

He buttoned up his trousers again and removed his jacket. As I strolled to the kitchen, desperate for what I was teasing but knowing it would be more fun if we waited, I heard a little laugh under his breathe and I looked over my shoulder to see him shaking his head at me, walking into the office.

'Do you want a drink?' I asked him from the other room.

'No, I think I'll wait until we are in Italy.' He joked back at me in a sarcastic yet sexy way.