What Should Have Been From The Beginning

Gifted, Talented, Extraordinary Surgeon

DEREK'S POV
Not so long after we had left each other, I met Meredith in the hall again. We were stood just outside the door to the stairwell and when I first saw her, I automatically noticed she wasn't looking great. She had a face of mixed emotions all over portraying a person of guilt and sadness.

'Hey, you?'

'Hey.' She replied back, with her hands in the pockets of her white coat, looking up at me from her feet. I run the side of her arm, knowing something was wrong and offered my compassion.

'The days already rough? What's up?'

'Cristina. I went to tell her but she already pissed at me.'

'What'd you do?'

'I did nothing. You did it.' She looked up at me again but showed absolutely no emotion. A confused expression covered my entire face and the confusion drowned my thoughts to. Meredith began to turn her back and walk away from me, down the stairwell. I grabbed her arm, so we could talk about this and pushed her into the stair space, where we could have more privacy.

'What do you mean I did it?'

'She's pissed at me because you got me my job back and then you put me on your service and now you're letting me scrub in on a surgery.'

'And she's pissed off at you because of that? Seriously? Meredith, I told you, I made you quit your job and move across the country into a program you hated. The stupidity of me, got engaged to a different woman and broke your heart. Your the love of my life and I'm going to do whatever it takes to get your life back to normal again and make it up to you. If that means letting your scrub in on every surgery and putting you on the service you love everyday, then that's what I'm gonna do. If she wants to be mad at me for that then let her, but she shouldn't be angry at you.' She looked at me with tears in her eyes and then she looked down to her feet, trying to hide her emotions from me. She couldn't hide them. I analysed every feature of her face and knew her so well and loved her so much that I knew exactly when she was upset. She used her finger to wipe anyway the tear that had fallen down her cheek in the moment of silence that filled the space between us. I used my thumb and my finger to pick up her head, placing my thumb under her chin and my finger on top. I took a step forward indicating that I was going to kiss her, but also giving her the time to move away if she wasn't in the mood. But she didn't. She gazed directly in my eyes allowing me to move in and kiss her, until our lips met each others and I instantly felt her relax and let some steam off, through our touch. She grabbed my face with her soft, delicate hands and kissed me harder. This time I felt a wet sensation on my cheek and realised she was crying again. Only a single tear but I knew the single tears that came from her eyes, held more emotion than the tears that came from sobbing. We finished kissing and breathed again. We both wiped the tears off our cheeks and I hugged her, bringing comfort to her again. Her arms were wrapped under my armpits and our heart we connected, with only skin separating them.

'Come on let's go to surgery. Let's have some fun.' I said then kissed the top of her head.

After many hours on our feet and many flirtatious looks exchanged through loupes, we finished our first surgery together as an engaged couple and managed to succeed in nobody knowing we were. We were now in the scrub room, alone.

'So Dr. Grey, would you like to grab some food then celebrate in the on-call room?' I nudged her and laughed as I finished my sentence, hoping she would realise what celebrating consisted of.

She smiled back and giggled, clearly knowing what I meant. 'Well Dr. Shepherd, I would love nothing more than to celebra-...' She was interrupted by her pager.

'We can celebrate after I go see the chief.'

'I look forward to it. To you.' She left my hanging as I leant in for a kiss and she just cheekily and teasingly smiled back at me as she dried off her hands with paper towels.

MEREDITH'S POV
'Hi Chief. You paged?'

'Yes, Meredith. Please sit down.' At this point I was still in the dark as to what I was being paged for but I assumed it was something about being back. 'Because this is your 3rd time in an interns programme, even though you've been here before, you have to retake a test. Not a huge one so don't worry but you do need to retake it. The board are obviously notified of your regular move around and have said that if you fail this exam you aren't going to be allowed back in. If I had it my way, you know, you wouldn't be doing it but like I did it's not big. Just make sure you pass. You're a gifted, talented, extraordinary woman who I believe will follow in the surgical footsteps of your mother.'

I was somewhat shocked at this news and now deep inside panicking about failing. I was told that it would only be like an interns test and if not easier, but still after all the stress that I already had on me, I wasn't sure about the outcome.

'You have to take the test with an invigilator of course and you'll take the test elsewhere outside of this hospital. There's a few others that i've been informed of also retaking this test so you won't be alone but they are from different hospitals meaning you can't do it here. I confident it's in a hotel about 2 hours away and you'll probably want to stay the night instead of travelling back.But we have everything paid for, you won't be on the night shift either so don't worry about that You have no reason t worry. You're not stupid. '

'Okay thanks Chief.' I said standing up and leaving the room to go find Derek.

'Oh and Meredith, Dr. Mei has to be in the hospital all day tomorrow for paperwork so try to steer clear of this wing.' I smiled and closed the door behind me.

My pager went off again, this time it was from Derek, from the on-call room. I arrived to be greeted by a shirtless, handsome, tanned man laid in the bed and opening the covers for me to climb in next to him.

'I thought we were getting food first.'