What Should Have Been From The Beginning

Expected Encounter

DEREK'S POV
I was ready for my future with Meredith and I had no doubt that she was too. She had saved me from a life I was about to live, regretting and longing for a different woman. We arrived at Meredith's house and all I could think about as we were walking up to the entrance, was every moment we had spent together in these spaces and loving on one another. Except when we first dated, we didn't realise the love we both held. I have been in love with her from the first day I met her. I had fallen in love instantly at the sight of her green eyes and long, mousey hair. I had fallen in love with her from the acts of passion she showed for everything she did and I knew I was going to fall in love with her when I listened to her cheeky tone when she replied back to my subtle offers when we first met. She was undeniably perfect in every way and there was no way in hell that I was going to let her slip from my arms again.

I had been on the computer searching for flights and hotels after she revealed she wanted to be in Italy. Just us two. I worked even harder at finding our destinations at the desperation of being able to hold her and never let go. She teased me and pissed me off by making me wait to have sex with the woman I loved, until we were in a magical place, but that only made me love her more, knowing that she wanted our 'first time' to be special. I knew fine well it would be something special wherever it was to be, it was with her. I needed something for her. I needed to make our time even more memorable that it already was going to be. The only problem being, I had no idea how to do that. No thoughts came immediately to mind until I made the perfect decision and knew it was the right decision. I travelled up the stairs about to tell Meredith I was leaving to go run errands and make my last visit to Jennifer's house. I wanted anything that tied me to her to be gone. I knew that I was extremely close to making the biggest mistake of my life, when I acknowledge that I had no love for Jennifer anymore. Meredith had my heart and forever. Every inch and ounce of it belonged to her and I was going to do everything I could to make her aware of that. I walked into her bedroom to find her curled up on top of the covers. Her hair wrapped around her neck so I walked to her and moved it from where it was. I noticed every breathe she took as I stood watching her, just in pure awe of how lucky I was to have her in my life and also in absolute disbelief that I had nearly let a blessing leave my life. I didn't want to wake her so I just left after I placed a gentle kiss of affection on her forehead and laid a blanket over the top of her, keeping her warm. She looked angelic and delicate as she slept and all I wanted to do was hold her in my arms, place her head on my chest and fall asleep cuddling her but I knew as soon as I got these errands over and done with, I would have all night and every night to do that and be in the moment with her.

I left a sweet note on the unit beside the front door, making Meredith aware of where I was and hoping she wouldn't be too startled when she realised I wasn't in the house still.

Meredith, I didn't want to wake you. You must have fallen asleep after you finished packing and you just looked so peaceful. I wanted to crawl right up next to you and swaddle you in my arms but I need to go out and get something for you. You're not allowed it until we arrive in Italy, which is all booked and ready to go. I'm getting my things from Jennifer's whilst I'm out and then I don't have to look back. When I get home, I have something planned for us so please wear that ratty Dartmouth t-shirt you look so good in and something comfy on your bottom half. I love you, Derek.

I arrived at what used to be our house but now was just Mei's. I was ready to just get whatever conversations where going to happen over and done with, so I walked in with an open mind of what I was about to face. I didn't know if she would be at the house or if it would be quick and simple, in and out. I unlocked the front door, since it seemed to be locked and I took that as a sign that she wasn't going to be home. Everything in the house was still exactly the way I had left it before I left to go and have my wedding, thankfully, broken up. There was bliss silence and only the floor boards creaking could be heard as I walked around downstairs, gathering what of mine I could see. As I made my way upstairs to my wardrobe, I heard faint noises of what seemed to be whimpers and they only grew more apparent as I stepped inside the room and Mei was brought to my attention. She sat looking helpless yet full of rage and anger as her focus turned to me. Not one of us spoke a word but I felt, even though I was glad to not be marrying her, that I should maybe apologise or offer an apology at least. I sat down on the bed beside her and put my arm around her trying to comfort her, after all, she had never done anything to dishearten me or displease me. It was a risky option but I brought her closer to me and hugged her. I could feel her cries get louder and more heartfelt.

'I am sorry, you know that. I'm sorry for humiliating you and for ruining your life.'

'You have not ruined my life. You ruined my day but it was going to happen sooner or later. I knew from the day I told you that I knew you and Meredith had had sex, that you weren't in the right place to get married. But I felt that if there was the slightest possibility you wanted to marry me that I was going to fight for it.' She spoke through her cries which had now slowed down and she had regained a calm mood.

'I loved you. But I'm happy and I'm in love with Meredith.'

She joked back to me, 'You know you probably shouldn't tell the woman you were about to marry hours ago, that you now don't love them anymore.'

I didn't speak but I did turn my head to hers as she lifted from my arms and looked me in the eyes. I went to speak even though I didn't know what I was about to say, when I got interrupted. 

'You treat me well for the duration of the time we were together before you had sex with another woman,' I could hear the pain in her voice and I genuinely was sorry but still I didn't regret doing what I did, 'and if you're happy which you are, then I clearly can't change your mind.' She leaned closer into me and closed her eyes. I didn't return the offer because I didn't want to kiss anyone other that the love of my life. I didn't need a goodbye kiss and the only goodbye kisses I wanted to receive were the ones from Meredith when she left to go to work for the day. I stood up, before our lips could touch, leaving her hanging and told her,

'I'm getting my things and leaving, I have to be somewhere.'