2nd Chances // Park Jihoon FF

075

3 months before the wedding.

"What do you think of this venue?" Our planner asked.  Today was the day that I would check out the two reception venue options.
Jihoon wasn't available to keep me company however.
So my mom did instead.

"Its beautiful." I said with heart eyes as I check the reception venue. I couldn't believe it.
This was way ahead of what I was expecting.
I know I wanted a dreamy wedding..but this..
This was just too much.
I'm not complaining though, I just can't believe im getting married.

"So do you like this one? Or the other one?" She asked.

"What do you think mom?" I looked over to my mom.
The previous one that we went to was also really beautiful that I can't even make up my mind right now.

"I think this one is more fitting to your concept. I like this one." My mom smiled.
Ofcourse, mothers knows best.

"Okay then, shall we go and sign some papers to finalise it?" I simply nodded my head and walked over to the office area to sign some papers with the owner of this place.
I was shaking as I signed the paper.
Imagine, i'm at the place where 3 months later, i'll be sitting, in a white dress and is officially known as Mrs.Park.
The thought alone gave me butterflies in my stomach.
This place was already beautiful, but the memories that's going to be created within it was a lot more priceless.

I've been crying, laughing, overthinking and any other things that a crazy person does.
Sometimes I think to myself, am I really ready for this?
Am I really ready to commit and start a family?
Am I ready to leave the life I have now?
Then I also answer myself.
Yes, I am ready. I've never been more ready.
This life I have now is only the warm up part of my life.
It made me learn all the things I have to in order to get to where I am now.
This was just a warm up for reality.
Marrying Jihoon, starting a future family with him.
That is my reality.
That is the reality i've been preparing for.
If I was still back in highschool this is exactly what I would say to myself.
I'm successful now, i'm stable.
I have two loving parents, and supportive friends.
And most importantly, an amazing fiancè.
Those are the only things I need to be okay.
To be ready.
I get all my strength from these people.
So I always believe that I am okay.
As long as I have them here, with me.

"Are you excited?" My mom squealed quietly.

"I'm nervous mom." I said biting my lips.

"There's no need for that. I know you're gonna be an amazing wife. And hopefully not too long later, a mother." She smiled.

Hmm. A mother.

That, i'm not quite sure if i'm fully ready for it.
If the time comes then it comes.
But for now, I wanna focus on becoming a great wife to Jihoon.
Only then would I start thinking of having a little park.

"Thank you for everything mom."

"Anything for my one and only princess" she said and booped my nose.

"Now, let's go and have lunch, i'm starving." My mom chuckled.
We finally headed out and grabbed a quick lunch.

*****

"So, how do you think of dad?" I popped a question out of nowhere.

"What? What made you ask that?" She asked, a little taken back.

"Well, you guys have been awfully close these days." I chuckled.

"Dear, it's only because we're both responsible for your wedding too." She said in defense.

"Are you sure that's all?" I smirked.

"Yes. That is all." She bluntly replied.

"Tsk." I sulked and continued to bite on my food.

I then, looked at my mom.
Just imagine how my life would've been if my parents never separated.
I've always been afraid of committment because of my parents' situation.
But as I grew much older, I started realising that separating doesn't mean you didn't love eachother anymore.
I know that my parents still loves eachother.
I can see it.
But I guess there is a broken part of them that somehow just can't be fixed.
Maybe this is what's best for them.
There is this one filipino saying.
"Pinag-tagpo, pero hindi tinadhana"
A filo friend of mine taught me the meaning of that.
It meant, we were meant to meet, but weren't destined for eachother.
It is such a sad yet beautiful meaning.

My parents were bound to meet, but they never ended up having a happily ever after.
But they love eachother, even when their hearts are long apart.
My parents love for eachother is stronger than anyones love.
They just couldn't fight for it as they had other priorities to focus on back then.

I wonder, is Jihoon really the one meant for me?

**********

Hey guys. Let me start off by apologising to you guys for keeping you guys wait for so long.
I was in a really dark place these past month. I needed to have a break from everything and didn't have the inspiration.
But I am back now, and I will try to be more active now.
We're almost coming to an end and I regret not being able to focus properly.
But thank you all for patiently waiting.

- taehyungxjack