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third
tears pooled your eyes as you stared at each other far off the distance, but you tried your best not to let your tears fall.
he gives you a small smile, but you return with a big one, your fingers uncontrollably fidgeting until he broke the eye contact.
and your tears betray you.
you wanted to interfere. you wanted to shout your love for him. you wanted everyone to know he was yours. he should've been still yours, and that he is yours.
but most of all, you wanted to take him away from the altar, where in a minute his soon-to-be wife will be entering.
but you know you can't. you've hurt him enough, it was time he was happy, happier than when he was with you. looking at him farthest from the altar, he was greeting his friends and obviously very nervous of becoming a wedded man in a matter of hours.
you continue to tear your heart into pieces by reminiscing your time together with yunho, how you were happy for each other as he was with you, how you loved each other and saw it through each others' eyes, and how you promised to be each other until the end- even if its wasn't with you, with each other.
flashback
"jeong yunho, get your ass in here!" you shouted from the living room and yunho came rushing as if something bad happened to you.
"why, what happened?" he cupped your cheeks after looking around you, but you were just sitting on the couch. you just smiled at him, and checked him out, only in his bottom pajamas, probably was still changing when you called him.
"nothing, can we cuddle?" you opened your arms and jumped at him, both of you giggling because of your randomness. he carried you to your shared bedroom to have a nice evening of cuddles.
-
"where do you want to go?" yunho asked as he played with your fingers, while you shared another night cuddling in each other's warmth, planning for your future dates.
"do you want me to tell you the truth?" you look at him straight in the eyes, wearing a poker face.
"uh.. yeah? why?" he confusingly furrowed his eyebrows, waiting patiently for your answer as he intertwined your hands.
"i want to go to the moon." it was a good minute he laughed as soon as he heard your answer while you just stared at him.
"the moon, seriously?" he continue to laugh while you pouted.
"what's wrong with wanting to go to the moon?" you sulked and hit his chest playfully. he calmed down after a while and appealed to you by kissing your cheeks, and then pecking your pouted lips.
"okay, okay." he brushed your hair back. "but why the moon though?" he finally settled down, holding you close again.
"i don't know too. it been my dream since i was a child. i thought eveyone did dream of going there?" you questioned, earning a hearty giggle from yunho.
"fine, let's do this." he took your face to look right at him, i will make tons and tons of money and promise to take you there. how's that?" he smiled at you lovingly, then kissed your forehead.
"you promised!" you squeal and back to his arms again, enjoying his warmth.
-
"let's.. let's take a break, yunho." you started. after your third anniversary, your relationship was falling apart. you got promoted on your work, but yunho wanted you on his tours too- which resulted to a lot of arguments.
"what? no! y/n, i don't want that." yunho aggressively breaks your eye contact, stared straight out of the car that he parked furiously because of another argument. he was keeping the tears to himself, and was not letting you win this one.
"you know we need it, yunho. admit it. you're tired, and i'm tired too." as calm as you can with your heaving heart, you talked to him with tears flowing unendingly out of your eyes.
"i said no, y/n! i'd rather do this all over again than lose you, y/n. no." he finally faced you, bloodshot eyes, cheeks flushed and tears dropping one by one.
"please.." that was the last thing you said before leaving him in the car a crying mess- the last time you saw each other.
end
after 5 years, you thought of going back to him after growing by yourself. you wanted to be better for him. but when you went back to his apartment, he was nowhere to be found, but the tv. he was pursuing his dreams and is successful, you were proud of him.
but you didn't regret anything, because you knew you were doing fine yourself too. but you also can't deny that you missed him, with all your heart. you still loved him to death- until you received the wedding invitation.
you looked at him for the last time, his smile as large and delicate as the whole world. before he was about to kiss the bride, you found your way out of the church, finding the oxygen you needed since awhile ago.
yunho, if not in this lifetime i'm yours.. maybe next lifetime. but today, i want you to be happy, don't be afraid to be happy- even if its not with me.
"until we meet again." you whispered to particularly no one, leaving like what you did the last time.
