Lost... (AOT Levi x Fem!Reader)

Episode 17+18: The Female Titan

It's been a weird week but everything went back to normal for the most part but that was until... It was the 57th expedition.

We all got our stuff and Rode outside the Walls with our horses whilst riding in our formation. I was a little nervous but composed myself. I'm going to follow orders for this expedition... I don't really want to but I have no choice.

~Flashback~

Erwin was having a meeting with me, Sam, Levi, Hanji, Mike and some other squad leaders. It was about the true plan for the 57th expedition.

We were discussing it and there was obviously arguing about it but it was mostly between me and Erwin. I didn't want to sacrifice our comrades but Erwin wasn't listening to me.

"Corporal (Y/n), we will discuss this later in my office." Erwin ordered.

I was extremely mad that I even stormed out and left the meeting early. I couldn't bare to hear this anymore! They have lives and people that love them! They are my comrades! I know they feel the same but I want to try and save them at least! I wasn't send here just to see people die! I have to do something!

Later that day, I went back to Erwin's office. It was still the same arguing and bickering but we weren't getting anywhere.

"Why can't we just find another way?!"

"There is no other way."

"Why?!"

He stayed silent...

"Why Erwin?! Why can't we?! They have lives! People that love them! Some even kids!"

"Corporal, please stop putting your own feelings into this. I don't want to sacrifice lives and neither do Levi, Hanji and Mike. But there is no other way..."

"... Bullshit." I said trying not to cry. This wasn't fair. We've already lost so many lives and now...

"(Y/n)... I know they mean a lot to you- they mean a lot to me too but... We must sacrifice lives for the greater good." Erwin said hanging his head low.

"But still... I just wish there was another way..." I said holding my arms.

He sighed,"I know... What did you have in mind? If you know a better way than tell me."

I stayed quiet. Honestly, I didn't have a plan. All I wanted was to save people. I could in the battle of Trost, why can't I here?

"I... I don't know... I haven't thought about it..." I said.

"We don't have time. We have to follow through. You have to follow through."

I felt utterly hopeless,"Y-Yes sir..."

~Flashback end~

As if reading my mind, Levi whispered,"I know you don't want to follow through with this so..."

I looked at Levi and he looked at me Seriously,"Go. Disobey orders. I know you can save them But promise me one thing... Come back. Meet us in the forest before she comes."

My eyes widened before giving Levi a small smile,"I promise."

I departed from the group and headed towards the right section. Levi's squad members were a little confused but ignored it for now.

As I was running with my horse, I saw purple smoke signals and knew she was getting close. I have to hurry!

~An hour later~

I managed to save some but that didn't mean they weren't injured. Once I told them to let the female titan in, they were beyond mad and confuse. I didn't tell them anything else and just kept quiet.

"Corporal! We have to or else that Titan is going to kill everyone!" Someone yelled.

"No! My orders to you are to let the female titan in but kill all other Titans. If you have a fucking problem with that then fine! Go kill yourself! I'm not going to save you then!" I yelled angrily.

They all stayed quiet before someone yelled,"I'll follow orders!" And then one by one they all did as they were told.

"Good. Don't try to kill the female titan, Olive will tell the rest of the scouts. I have to get back. For now just keep going to the forest and then protect it from Titans. Kill the Titans if possible." I then ran forward with my horse and tried getting back to Levi while Olive did as told.

I saw more smoke signals go off but I tried to ignore them. I can't go save them because I have to get back to Levi's squad or else Erwin is going to have my head. I'm sorry... Please forgive me my follow comrades...

I finally got to the forest and saw some Cadets on the tree branches guarding the forest. I was about to go in but someone interrupted me.

"Corporal! What's going on?"

"I don't have time to tell you! Just guard the forest and if possible kill the Titans!" I ran in ignoring the persons calls and just headed forward.

At last, I made it back safely. Levi noticed me and whispered,"And?"

"It's a shit show but some lives are spared."

"That's good."

"Thank you, Levi." I whispered and blushed a little.

"Tsk. Anytime brat."

We all just kept running with our horses until we heard Titan footsteps. She's here.

I looked back and saw her run towards us. Some scouts tried to kill her but she just killed them in an instant. I looked forward trying to silence my screams in my head yelling at me to save them but it was no use due to Levi's squad members yelling at him for orders.

It was upsetting and I didn't like this at all. I know what happens but... I can't help but feel anxious and depressed about this. Mostly anxious. Everything felt like time was moving too fast and too slow. Not giving us some time to think at all.

"Everyone, cover your ears." Levi said holding out the Acoustic gun (used a special shell that emitted a high-pitched noise).

I got out mine as well and then nodded at Levi. We both shot the guns together whilst everyone was covering their ears.

Fuck you, Female Titan