Behind the smile

Lonely

Surrounded by family and friends

In a home, I always feel by myself

At night, my mind soaks thoughts unsaid

Surrounded by hope, filled with dread

In a sea of people, all they see is a pretty smile

But they never notice that I hide my pain sometimes

I wonder what would happen if I simply disappeared for a while

I silently fight my demons left unslain

From subtle whispers to outlandish screams

I can't escape my hazed dreams

People say I seem so bright

If only they saw what I think at night

Loneliness is a familiar feeling

People see only what I made them see

But in reality, my mind is reeling

My only wish is my demons to set me free

Lonely is a strong word

I feel it often that is true

I wish if I was a bird

I would fly and ease my emotions in a sky of blue

Freedom is what I crave

Free of demons and dreams

To my mind, I'm a slave

My mouth silent yet my heart scream

What my mind speaks

They will never know

On my porcelain face a river leak

They never notice me, only my show

I am the porcelain doll they made me

Eyes darker than the black sea

A face that shows perfection

And a mask to house my inner destruction

Yes, I am lonely

Only those who feel it can see

For you, I smile momentarily

The show is starting, do you want to join me?