JUST IN TIME (Author's Reco)

LIFE GOES ON

LISA

           
My grind goes like, waking up in the morning. Checking on my son right away.
Feed him when he's hungry. Cook my breakfast. Eat. Take him to bath. I can't leave him in the living area alone. Wait for his nanny Gina so I can go to work. Work. Meetings here and there. Squeeze my mind with never before seen and heard ideas. Get our food stocks. Go home. Be with my son. Take care of him. Work at home. Put him to sleep.

           
I couldn't remember when was the last time I bonded with my workmates here in London. Well, it's not my priority. I would love going home to my son and feel his hugs and see him smile. So that's the routine.

           
Wait, there's one thing I haven't mentioned. Forgetting Jennie is also part of my daily grind. She never called me. Never sent me a message and ask even just about her son. None. Never.

           
I decided to cut all my connections with people in Korea. I don't waNt to hear anything about her. I want to forget her the soonest possible time. You might be thinking if I am opening my doors to someone for love? Nope. I'd rather give all my love to my son and myself. I'm afraid too. I'm afraid to fall in love again. I want to give the best life to Rion.

           
One night, I checked my passbook with my savings reflected on it. I am saving for his future and for the Advertising company I am dreaming of building someday. I don't want to be a forever employee. I want to be the boss while enjoying my work. In order for that to happen, I sold the first car I bought and got a cheaper one. My meals are very ordinary everyday. I avoid expensive coffee and I don't buy new clothes for myself when not needed.

           
Rion's needs. Nanny's salary. Electric and water bills. Apartment. Car. Food. Necessities. British Culture Class. All my money for now is just for those things that we need at the moment.

           
Imagine how I survive this monthly struggle being a single parent in an expensive City. Well, this is my choice. And I love my son so much so I would try my best to give the best for him. Nothing but the best.

           
Living alone with my son is honestly sad. But I am just looking at the brighter side of life and encourage myself to keep going. I admit, I am having a hard time forgetting Jennie. Now that my son is turning 1, it really breaks my heart thinking that we're going to spend it with just the two of us.

           
Even if this is not the life I imagined few years ago, I have to accept it. I have to accept the fact that it won't always come out as expected and planned. At 22, I can say that I am not also ready for this like Jennie. But I have to be ready. Who else will?

           
Rion is the product of my love for Jennie. He's my only source of happiness and strength now and surely he is the reason why I am still breathing. This may not be the choice I wanted, but the moment I saw Rion for the first time and held him in my arms, I told myself that this is the life I want now. To have him. To take care of him and love him unconditionally.

           
I may not have the chance of enjoying the life of being a young professional anymore, but I am embracing every moment now that I have this beautiful boy who is my happiness for a lifetime. If there's also this one person I get my strength from, it's my brother Jackson.

           
He calls me once in a while to check on me. He promised that after his wife gives birth, they would visit me here. You know that my brother loves me so much, right?
He's asking again if I need financial help. I declined again because I still have money and I am working hard to provide for my son. I also don't want to put a burden on his shoulder now that he is also starting a family with his kind wife Sheri.