Freedom: Levi Fanfiction

|| A tearful goodbye

54

A few houses away, I watched as Levi tended to Erwin. Tears wouldn't stop flowing from my eyes. I was still the same coward who only ran half-assed apologies in my head. The eyes of those who used to look up to me avoided my presence. 

        "Eren..." My brother looked away. A few minutes later, the sounds of large footsteps came thundering toward Bertholdt. The Titan had mid-length blonde hair. It was scrawny looking and skinny. The only thought that had appeared to my mind was Armin. 

Levi didn't save Erwin. He saved the little boy with the dream to reach the sea. I covered my mouth and ran immediately toward Levi, Hange then followed. 

        "Levi you..." He looked at me, and then at Erwin. 

        "You were right," he said. "He had no choice but to become a devil. And when he was finally set free from hell, we wanted to bring him back once more. It was time... to let him rest."

I covered my mouth and began to breathe unpredictably. I propped myself beside the Commander and held his hand. It was cold and devoid of life. 

Erwin had died. 

        I remembered a lot of things while I clung onto his hand: I remembered when he assigned me as his right-hand for the first time, or when he told me he was proud of what I had done. I remembered when he screamed with so much energy when we first left before the expedition. It was something I had never seen him do before. I remembered... when he told me he loved me before he marched to his death.

The only thing I did was cry. It was just as painful as losing my parents. 

I lost a brother. A commander. A friend. But at least... I said a proper goodbye. 

        Hange wrapped her arms around me, pulling me in her embrace for support. I gasped and huffed for air. I had been crying so hard it was hard to breathe. Nothing could ever bring him back. 

Levi's eyes were threatening to let out their tears. Still, he managed to loosen Erwin's bolo and remove it from its owner. He then opened my palms, placing the tie inside it. 

        "I couldn't do this with Petra but here," Closing my fingers with his hand, he looked at me once more. "Erwin still lives on inside that bolo." I stared at it, realizing that I had something similar in my room. He had given me a medal for what I had done five years ago. I was an ungrateful piece of shit who never understood its value but now... I realized it was worth more than a box of gold. 

I let go of Hange and turned my attention on Levi, wrapping my arms around him as I finally gained composure. "Thank... you," I said in a hoarse voice. 

~

Four hours later, we all retreated atop the walls where Armin and Sasha rested. I took those four hours as a chance to reflect on everything. To be honest, the wound of losing someone that close to me was still fresh and even I still couldn't comprehend the fact that Erwin was gone. But we all had to move on. 

        My fingers slowly crept on my chest, reaching for Erwin's bolo that Levi had given me. Even If I couldn't kill the Beast Titan, there was still one more order left for me to do. I wondered what those letters said. And I remembered him saying there was a stockpile of it. I sat on the edge of the gigantic wall and let my legs waver in the air.

I couldn't help but grin. The handwriting would probably be unreadable. But I was glad—I was happy that I could still fulfill one last order of his.