55
The dark skies engulfed the land of Paradis. As I stared outside the large windows of our headquarters, my eyes were glued onto the stars splattered in glowing white light. When I turned to face the front, I had expected to see a dim yellow light escaping small gap between the door to Erwin's office and the floor. There was nothing.
I just now realized again that he was no longer here with us. It's been twelve hours since the dawn of our victory. I vaguely remembered the people's cheers and hurrahs of triumph, although I was too shocked at what we had discovered in my basement to truly feel happy.
A sad smile slowly appeared on my face when I knocked on the large wooden doors. Inside my hand was the thin book father had written for me.
The doors creaked loudly as I opened it. The smell of new books and scented candles entered my nose, reminding me of how often Erwin would stay up all-night reading books. Levi and I have always debated whether or not he was asleep or if his eyes were too glued on a new story.
There were no signs of dust or dirt inside his office. As much as Erwin hated to admit, Levi's clean-freak-nature had definitely rubbed off on him. I lit the tall candle lamp standing on his desk and watched as it engulfed the room with warm yellow light. The last time I was in here, his desk was full of distractions. I was glad to see that there was not one bit of change.
My fingers slowly traced its way to his desk and unto his drawers where I expected to see a pile of letters. I sat on the cold cushion of his chair and took a deep breath. Before I took everything in, I placed the book Dr. Jaeger wrote for me on Erwin's desk. I wanted to read it where I can let my emotions flow freely. This office, the smell, the memories, the crazy conversations, it was a perfect place. My mouth turned agape at a small box inside his drawer.
Letters, it said on the front. Could he be any more obvious? I smiled. The metal lock clicked as the wooden case opened. There were letters not only dedicated to me, but also to the Military Police's commander, Nile Dok and Levi. I noticed that there were indeed a stockpile of handwritten letters inside this box, all neatly put together inside.
My brows furrowed when I realized that some of the dates written in front dated back a few years ago; there was one for me, on the twelfth of February year 844, my birthday. Another one two years later, the year after my coma. Had he been writing letters to me for a long time?
I gently opened the letter with the most recent date on it: the date before the expedition. I wanted to smile, the commander's handwriting had gotten better after a few months. But I was saddened to realize that he had been dedicating letters to me for a long, long time.
My eyes traced each word, from right to left, and I struggled to hold my tears. The letter said:
Dear Iris,
I am saddened to know that this may be my last letter. Tomorrow, we will travel and march onto what will probably be our deaths. Tomorrow, we will die victorious. However, as I am writing my twentieth letter dedicated to you, I realized that luck had always been at your side. From the moment I saved you, the scared girl in the woods, I knew for a fact that death liked to escape from you. You will live through the pain, Iris, thankfully just like last time. I know because you are one special woman, and that I had once fallen in love with a fighter named Iris.
The night of our conversation, I debated with myself whether or not I tell you the truth. And that I did. Except the truth wasn't really what it seemed. The truth was that I love you—loved you. Unfortunately, I realized quickly that there was no room for me in your heart. I was happy to know that a soldier like you finally had the chance to know what love was amidst all our sacrifices and pain. So I foolishly pushed him toward you. I watched a romance bloom, and I was happy to see you smile. I was glad to watch you from afar, no matter how much it pained me.
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Freedom: Levi Fanfiction
Fanfiction"The only way is forward", said Iris Schmidt, a refugee adopted by Grisha Jaeger. At the young age of 15, Iris watched as her parents were mercilessly eaten alive by a deformed titan. All she had known was a peaceful life outside the walls, secluded...
