Goku X Vegeta Oneshots

"Sheron Is Going To Kill Us."

Ten minutes.

I left him alone for ten minutes, casually reading the newspaper and waiting for my coffee to brew.

"Vegeta! Vegeta, lookie!" My eyes drift from my reading material to my mate who comes rushing excitedly out of the bathroom and I'm not sure what to say. "I see... What's on your face?" Kakarot makes somewhat of a duh face at me, as if I should know why he would want to mutilate his face in such a glittery fashion.

"I've bedazzled it with diamonds! Cool, huh?" Only sighing, I place down my newspaper which I won't get a chance to finish while staring at him with a strange mixture of amusement and disbelief.

"Uh huh. Cool indeed, love. Might I ask what you used to make this 'bedazzling masterpiece' of yours happen?" Going rigid, he peers at me guiltly, twiddling his thumbs.

"U-umm... Gorilla glue?"

Wow... And I thought the only thing I wouldn't be able to do is finish reading. Now it looks like I won't get to relax today either. "Gorilla glue." I muse, the farthest from surprised. "You put gorilla glue directly on your face."

"Yeah! What's the big deal?" I don't think I have the patience at this very second to explain to him what he's done.

"Let's just go." I say, slightly exasperated and already at the brewing machine to turn it off. It's a shame, really. Coffee is the only thing that would make dealing with this a little more tolerable.

"Wh-where are we going?" Now he's scared. He couldn't have felt this way when he was applying one of the strongest glues, if not the strongest in the world to his wonderful face? Why me?

"Well Kakarot, since your attention span is so short and you decided to do what you did, we are going to Bulma's house to get the dragon radar. Maybe you can explain to her why we have to summon the eternal dragon to fix your... makeover." He pouts, my irritation melting a bit. He's such an idiot and because I don't want to hurt his feelings, I won't laugh at him.

In front of him.

"Shenron's going to kill us." He groans, frown deepening.

"Correction, darling." I emphasize, trying my hardest to hide a chuckle. "He is going to kill you."

-'-----

A/n: I'm going to be updating like crazy this weekend(not just this book) bc I will be going on a brief hiatus starting on Monday. I love you. ❤💫