Locked Away

Ch9

TW: abuse, rape, suicidal thoughts

Four and a half months missing

I'm never getting out of here. I want to go home. I don't like Finn. He hurts and scares me so much. I hate it. But at the same time I'm kind of resolved with it? Like I know it won't ever change. After all, he's told me repeatedly that no one is looking for me.

Meredith sighs and sits cross legged on the floor in her corner of the basement. She can't even see three feet in front of her with the lights out. That's how dark it always is in there. Whenever she needs to use the bathroom or well the bucket , she always has to crawl around and search for it. Much safer than attempting to walk in the pitch black and falling over. Sometimes she'll bump into her toilet bucket and send its contents spilling out of it if Finn hasn't taken it upstairs to empty it recently.

And because the basement is sound proof she never hears anything other than herself breathing. She always gets so terrified if she hears the door opening. The creaking of the door always sounds so loud to her since she doesn't get to hear a lot of sounds these days. It's always so quiet. So quiet, she could hear a pin drop, if there was a pin to be dropped that is.

This is my life now. This toilet bucket, no sounds, total darkness, these are all my new normals. I hate it but at the same time I accept it I guess? I just know nothing will ever change so I may as well just accept it. Maybe one day I'll get lucky and Finn will finally kill me and I'll be free from him. But until then I'm stuck here.

I will never be free. This basement... is my home. Finn will be the only person that I get to see. I will never have a bed again, or comfy blankets or pillows, or even just a place to call my own. I will always be stuck with Finn. I'll always be his. No one else wants me anyways.

Meredith sighs. She brushes away some tears that have escaped. Even though she has accepted her fate, that doesn't mean she has to like it. She wants to be free of Finn in the worst way but knows it'll never happen.

"I want to go home." Meredith whispers to herself. She pulls the blanket that Finn gave her closer around her shivering body.

After Finn ripped her clothes and completely made them unwearable she had to suffer without any clothes for a few days until Finn came downstairs and threw this blanket at her telling her to cover herself so he doesn't have to see her disgusting body anymore. The days she had to get through without clothes were so hard because she was absolutely freezing down here in the basement. Finn deliberately keeps it at freezing cold temperatures in the basement to make her suffer. He always loves finding new ways to make her suffer.

Five months missing

Month five now... it just gets worse and worse every day with Finn. He seems to be mad at something lately and of course he takes it out on me. He'll come in multiple times a day to beat me up. If I thought I was in pain before... it's worse now. The pain from all of the beatings before was so bad but it's just so much worse now. And he's been raping me even more lately. I feel so dirty.

He will go days without giving me any food. I'm so hungry all of the time. My hunger never goes away. And I've lost my period. It's been a few months without my period now. It must be that my body can't handle having a period at my size. I've lost so much weight from Finn barely feeding me. It's not good. I'm so underweight. I need food. This isn't good for my body.

Finn comes downstairs a few minutes later. He slams the door open and it bangs against the wall, making a loud noise. The room also becomes lit up with light. Meredith, who is not used to many sounds anymore, cowers in fear and puts her hands over her ears to block out the noise.

Too loud! It hurts my ears.

I'm scared. What is Finn coming down here for now? I'm already in so much pain from today's  earlier beating. My body can't handle much more pain.

"Meredith!" Finn yells loudly. "Get over here now!"

Meredith curls her body into a ball, terrified at what's going to happen to her now.

"I didn't say you could lay there! You're so lazy! Get over here!" When Meredith still didn't move Finn strode over to her and yanked her up by her arm making her whimper in pain.

Please stop. That hurts.

"You are so useless!" He yells, slapping her in the face. He pushes her down on the floor and gets on top of her. He then rapes her again. Once he finishes he kicks her a few times and then leaves the room, turning off the lights putting her back into pure darkness.

Meredith lies there sobbing with tears streaming down her face.

I want to die. This needs to stop. I can't handle this anymore.

Meredith all of a sudden realizes she is bleeding.

What? My period? There's no way I have my period. My body isn't able to handle a period at my weight. And this is weird. It's so much heavier than normal.

Ow! That hurts! These cramps are so painful! Ow!

Meredith holds her belly and just curls her body in a ball, trying to make the pain from the cramps better.

I hope you liked!