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chapter twenty-two

I don't remember how long we stayed in that embrace... but it was longer than only some seconds.

I must have drifted off into sleep at some point, because when my eyes flutter as I wake up, we're not sitting in that chair anymore. Clay must have carried me... us... into the bed after I fell asleep without me noticing it, or we would still be sitting there – in that close embrace.

I kind of remember him cleaning me up. A cloth used to swipe away all the juices on my body, especially my thighs – but after that there is no memory left of yesterday night.

I yawn lightly, moving my arms a bit. Then I turn my body.

I only now realize that there's an arm resting over my waist – it doesn't fall down as I move, but I suddenly feel its heaviness on my body.

I blink as I have now Clay's face in my sight. He's still asleep.

My lips start forming a smile – I can't help it. He seems so... calm. I watch the outline of his jaw – the way it perfectly shapes his face. His hair is longer than the last time I've visited home. Seems to also have gotten wavier and my eyes follow one of the waves that fall into his face.

I know that I can't go back to sleep anymore, even if I feel warm and cozy in the bed. The blanket wrapped over both of us (even if I'm pretty sure I got more than the half of it) and Clay's arm around me wants to make me stay here forever.

My eyes drop down to his lips. They are tinted in this beautifully rose, that I realized the first time I really ever spoke with him – not when we were kids, but about four years ago. And when we... really became friends about two years ago, I got to see them more often... sometimes once a week, sometimes every day.

I can't seem to release my gaze from his lips, but I force myself – maybe because I stared at them for a bit too long, which I really shouldn't (right?), maybe because I had the sudden urge to kiss them..., which I really shouldn't...

Just as I'm thinking that, Clay's eyelids move and they open. They're moving slow, but I think I reacted too late. I shut my eyes as if I had something to hide if I left them open, but as I hear a light exhale form Clay's nose, I know that I've been caught.

I open my eyes again carefully, but I guessed right – Clay's lips form an amused smile.

We look each other in the eyes now, him breaking the silence at first. "Morning, peanut", he mumbles, voice raspy from sleep.

"Morning", I say back, equally silent. My hand grabs on the blanket and I bring it closer to me.

"I saw that, by the way", Clay mumbles, referring to my eyes that have been examining his face.

"No, you haven't."

There's his chuckle again.

I open my mouth to say something else again, but I don't even start as Clay's arm around me tugs me closer towards his body and our skins brush.

Also, I'm closer to these lips.

We're both quiet for some moments and I let my body feel Clays'.

"Can-?" We both start speaking the same word at the same time and I giggle.

Clay's lips also curl from the coincidence. "You first", he allows me.

"I- I wanted to ask you if you could give me a ride home", I fumble for words. I don't have my car at his house and... well he promised it yesterday to Evan... in some kind of way.

Clay groans, but there's a grin on his face. "Man... you should have let me talk first. I wanted to ask you if I can kiss you", he says.

I snort, knowing that this is not what he really wanted to ask me.