Fated To Be His...

6. He left me...

"A-Zhan?", came a soft call again and Zhan wiped the tears rolling down his face with the back of his hand. "Yeah?",he responded as he tried to stand but Yichen's hand came over his and Yichen kneeled before him while Zhan sat on the log. "It's him, isn't he?", Yichen asked softly and Zhan looked away. "I don't know what you are talking about. Everyone is so happy after so long. My Omega ass just got overwhelmed", Zhan said to save face and felt Yichen thumb away another tear from his face. "Lying doesn't suit you, Zhan. The longing, the anger in your eyes says an entirely different story. It's him, isn't he? The one you talked about." It was as if a volcano erupted and Zhan broke into a cry hiding his face with his hands. Yichen gathered him in his arms and Zhan grabbed the Alpha's shoulders crying his heart out. Yichen patted his head, occasionally running his hands through Zhan's hair softly while Zhan let out everything he had bottled up inside. The pain of getting abandoned by the one he had loved with everything in him, the happiness he felt seeing that face again and the rage that came along with those tender emotions, it swept over Zhan and Zhan lost control. It was after several minutes that his cries subsided to occasional sniffles and Yichen stared into the man's red-rimmed, swollen eyes filled with anguish. "What happened between you and him?",Yichen asked gently wanting to know what the Alpha of the Wang pack had done to make Zhan hurt so much. What had the Alpha done to make Zhan fall so deeply in love with him?

Yichen would be lying if he said he didn't hate the man. Yichen hated the Wang Alpha the moment Zhan's eyes settled on him. Yichen had seen Zhan's eyes roam over the crowd before they landed on the said Alpha and the raw need in his eyes was a blow to Yichen. The love on Zhan's face left a bitter taste in Yichen's mouth and the Alpha had to gather every ounce of control he had to stop himself from ripping Zhan's eyes away from the man himself. It hadn't been easy loving the perfect man before him. Three years and every single glance from Zhan pulled Yichen deeper and deeper into love. Yichen had seen Zhan all those years ago and he had fallen hard at first sight. Fallen to the extent where he was ready to be anything...anything Zhan wanted. A friend, a confidant, an acquaintance...Yichen would've become anyone if only he got to be near Zhan. It had worked. Knowing he was someone important and one of the people Zhan cared about had been enough all this time. Even when sometimes Yichen wanted nothing more than pulling Zhan to him and taking him as his, Yichen had not acted upon his desires. Even when that tempting scent of plum blossoms and cinnamon belonging to Xiao Zhan drove him crazy, Yichen had never touched Zhan. He knew the wolf's heart belonged to someone else but Yichen had thought that someday he will break the walls around Zhan's heart. Zhan had never spared another Alpha a tender look and now? Now, Yichen had seen what Zhan looked like when he was in love. He knew what need and hunger looked like on Zhan's face and Yichen wanted it for himself. His wolf wanted that look directed towards him. Only him. But, he was too late. There was a man who held Zhan's heart in his hands and was stupid enough to let him go. Yichen wanted to know what kind of a man Wang Yibo was to be so blind. So blind that he let someone as precious as Xiao Zhan slip through his fingers. "What happened, Zhan?", Yichen pressed again and heard a sharp intake of breath by Zhan before his sweet voice was heard again.

"Yibo was only five when his pack was attacked by someone and his entire family was killed right in front of his eyes. His mother was the last one to lose her life and before dying, she made Yibo leave. Asked him to run away as far away as possible and Yibo did. He was only five, a mere child when everything was ripped away from his hands and he ran...ran until he couldn't run anymore. He told me he was in the forest, starved and exhausted when he heard cries of a child and some men nearby. He observed the men and found that the men belonged to a trafficking gang. They were all jackal shifters and were going to sell that child to the highest bidder in the market. Yibo didn't know what the words actually meant but seeing the way the people treated that child, ignoring his hungry cries and cursing him, Yibo understood they didn't care about the child. Yibo took that child and was found by Lei in the woods nearby. He had snarled at Lei at first but when Lei saw him holding a toddler Lei offered him a place to stay and Yibo stayed with him."

"That child..was it you?",Yichen asked carefully and a small smile came onto Zhan's lips as he stared ahead, lost in those old times. "Yes. I was taken when I was only two and I don't have any memories regarding who I was before Yibo found me. Don't remember my parents, my pack...not even my name. Yibo was the one who named me. I cried because we had different surnames." Zhan added with a laugh but tears were rolling down his cheeks. "Every single day since then he was beside me. He took care of me like a mother takes care of her child, scolded me like a father when I was being naughty, he was a friend when I was having trouble shifting the first time. He was...everything to me. We did everything together. I can't even say when I fell in love. Maybe the day I met him. Maybe the day I scented him the first time. I dreamed of spending my life with him. Bearing his mark and being his but one day, he said that he had to go and avenge his family and he left." Anger had clouded Zhan's vision and he wiped his tears aggressively, trying to pull himself together. "You hate him because he left?",Yichen asked and Zhan turned to the Alpha with a bitter expression on his face. "You think that too, huh?", he asked with a hollow laugh and stood up. "Lei thinks the same. He thinks I hate Wang Yibo because he chose to avenge his family over me. It was never that, Yichen." Yichen stood up and Zhan looked at him, his chest aching. "For sixteen years of my life, Yibo was there. Protecting me, helping me. I couldn't change a fucking light in my room without his help and then one day...he left. He didn't even think how I would survive without him. Didn't care how I will breathe without him. He taught me everything I know but he didn't teach me how to live without him. He left me alone to fend for myself when he clearly knew I would die without him. He knew it...he just didn't care." Zhan took a deep breath and looked at Zhuo Yichen, trying his best to hide his pain and joy he felt because of seeing Yibo.

"When someone becomes the sole reason for your existence it isn't easy to replace that person. I couldn't live without him but I was forced to. I wanted to leave with him, you know. I wanted to protect him too the way he did for me. Thinking that he was out there, all alone, no one to take care of him gave me nightmares. I loved him too much, Chen. He was everything to me. My everything and he just vanished. That coward drugged me before leaving just so he didn't have to deal with me. I didn't even get a chance to say goodbye. It wasn't easy accepting that he didn't care for me. Now, I find out that he was out there, building a pack...building a life without me and I hate myself. Hate myself for waiting...waiting and wishing that I would see him someday. Hate myself for the relief I felt when I saw his face. Hate myself because I still love him...so much." The words dropped to a whisper and Yichen took a few steps back so that Zhan didn't sense the hurt and anger on him. But, when those almond eyes  locked with his again, Yichen knew that he didn't hide his emotions well enough. "There was a reason why I told you I couldn't accept your feelings, Yichen. When he left me, he took my everything with him. I am nothing but an empty shell and I have nothing to give you. Nothing." Zhan walked away wiping his cheeks and Yichen stood rooted to the ground, too numb and too hurt to follow Zhan. He knew what he should have done. He should have hugged Zhan to him and should have comforted him as expected from a friend. But, Yichen couldn't. Looking at that beautiful face hurt too much. Hearing Zhan's voice filled him with too much anger and that scent would have made Yichen cry tonight. So, he stood there alone...for minutes...for hours, the fear of losing Zhan hounding him more than ever before.

"Zhan! I was looking for you", came Wang Lei's anxious voice and Zhan turned to the elder with a calm look on his face. "Where is he?", Zhan asked in a dead tone and Lei grabbed his shoulder. "He left. I guess you both need time to settle into the situation."  "Did you know, Lei?", Zhan asked softly and Lei raised his hands in the air in a placating gesture. "Let's sit first", said the lion shifter pulling a chair for him and Zhan sat woodenly, waiting patiently for Lei's words. "Yibo called me after the attack happened. He found out about Chang Xia and told me he would help. He put his men out there and he told me not to tell you anything", said the man and Zhan nodded. "Thanks for being honest, Lei", said Zhan and Lei took in Zhan's appearance knowing he had made a mistake by not telling Zhan about Yibo. "Zhan, Yibo-" "I don't want to talk about it, Lei", said Zhan cutting him off and Lei closed his mouth. "The Wang Alpha has been a great help to us. Thanks to him all the members here can rest easy. Please tell him that I am grateful to him. If not for him, none of the members would have been so happy tonight. Thank him for me. I am tired now, I will take my leave", Zhan whispered in a detached voice and Lei watched the Omega leave the clearing for his room. The pain that Zhan was trying to hide was still visible for all to see and Lei didn't know what to say. "Lei, Why is Zhan-ge leaving?", asked Wei Wei as she came behind him. "He is tired", Lei responded and Wei Wei nodded. "He has been working too hard these days. It's good if he rests. I met the Wang Alpha, Lei. He is so nice" ,she said with a smile and Lei nodded.