I'm falling for you, Professor | ✔️

Nine

Liam Driscoll

Why did I say that.

Fuck.
He does not look happy.
I'm not ready for this, but here it goes...

Shit. Shit. Shit.

"You wanted to see me, professor Driscoll? If this isn't about an assignment, I should probably go." He says, avoiding eye contact.

"Well... T-The thing is, I was hoping y-you..."

For fuck sakes! Just speak, it isn't that God damn hard! Ask him out for dinner. That's all you have to say. D-i-n-n-e-r.

"W-Would you l-like to...Um..."

Dammit!

"You-You-You what? Just spit it out." He snarled.

"You want to tell me again how much you regret our night together? Is that it? Oh, W-W-Will we can't do this. It isn't right. Or how about W-We can't do this again, Will, i'm too old for you. Or-"

"You know what, n-nevermind William. I apologize for bothering you... I hope you have a good rest of your e-evening." My heart tensed at his antics. He doesn't know about my impediment, and he doesn't need to know, but damn. The last time someone mocked me for being unable to speak properly I was just a kid. Antonio never made fun of it, he was always so relaxed and patient with me when it came out... Even before I told him about it. He'd thought I was just nervous, and it does come out when I'm out of my comfort zone but still.

Doing my best to mask my expression, I turn away from him, hastily tossing my belongings into my bag while bumping his shoulder as I go to leave. This is why you don't sleep with your students, and exactly why he's too young for me. Acting like a freaking child.

"Liam!" He shouts. Nope, not doing this shit.

I stopped just as I reached the exit and spoke.

"Good night Mr. Barlowe. D-Don't forget about your assignment tomorrow." I spoke with tightness in my throat, attempting to show as little emotion as possible.

"Please wait, I'm sor-"

I shake my head and don't look back. The sound of the door closing echoing from behind me.

And that was the one and only time I tried speaking with William in two weeks. I've been keeping myself busy with grading papers and preparing our first exam that's going to be held next Friday.

I wouldn't give anyone a chance to speak with me before or after class ended. I've showed up just as class starts and i'm always packed up and ready to go five minutes early. I let them know if they needed me to send me an email.

All I've been thinking about is speaking with William. Just to hear his voice... But there's no fucking way i'm going to try and speak to him first. Not if he's going to joke about the way that I talk. It's embarassing. The moment has been on replay in my head every single fucking day these past two weeks. Every day. I just wish I didn't make a fool of myself to him.

I'd planned to ask him to my house for dinner that evening, to talk and just see how well we get along outside of the bedroom. I wanted to get to know him, to see if our connection is something to pursue, no matter the risks. I'm just not so sure I want to deal with his tantrums.

I feel like he doesn't see it from my perspective. He doesn't realize the risks of us being together, in any way really. I'm just so hung up on him I don't know how to stop these feelings. It's eating me alive.

I had to stay a bit later today in my office to grade some essays and other small assignments, but as soon as 4 o'clock came around I packed up my belongings and walked outside. My phone buzzes in my back pocket as I walk through the quad, I pull it out to see a text from Luke.