The Calm After The Storm (Athenians Series #2)

Chapter 30

Chapter 30

Trigger Warning: Self-Harm, Suicide Ideation

“Hello?” bungad ko kay Kuya Derrick.

After kasi naming magkita ni Friz ay dumiretso na siya sa titirhan niya, malapit doon sa may Big Ben. Sa susunod nga raw na pagkikita namin ay mag-iikot-ikot kami rito sa London.

“Wala na naman si Dizelle rito!” Kuya Derrick exclaimed.

“Ha!? Sabi mo nandiyan siya sa condo niya?”

“Oo nga! But I already checked her condo and she‘s not here!” I gasped because of the bad news.

Nasaan ka na naman ba, Dizelle?

“Hanapin mo muna sa building ng condo niya, Kuya! Baka may binili lang o baka umalis!” utos ko.

“Wala rito ang mga gamit niya, Dianne,” seryosong wika niya.

“N-naglayas siya?” I slowly whispered.

“Yeah.” I heard that he gasped.

“Hindi ko na alam kung saan ko siya hahanapin, wala na akong kilala na kaibigan niya.” Napa-upo ako dahil hindi ko na rin alam ang gagawin ko.

“I guess, let‘s just wait her message? B-baka gusto niya lang muna na mapag-isa,” bulong ko.

“Okay, balitaan na lang kita. Huwag ka munang lumabas kasi alam kong pagod ka pa sa biyahe mo. Have a good rest,” bilin niya pa at saka niya na binaba ang tawag.

Napahiga na lang ako sa kama dahil problemadong-problemado ako, hindi na namin alam kung saan namin matatagpuan si Dizelle. My phone rang again and I got it lazily.

“Yes, Friz?” I asked.

“Dianne, I‘m sorry. Hindi muna tayo matutuloy ngayon, hinahanap ko na kasi ngayon ang parents ko. Hmm? Let’s meet in other day,” he whispered through our conversation.

“Really? It is okay with me, babe! Stay safe, love lots!” I said and I hanged up.

Medyo nakakatampo na hindi kami matutuloy ngayon ni Friz. Of course... he promised. He promised me that he wanted to accompany me here in London. But yeah, nevermind. I understood him but it‘s kinda... disappointing.

“Ang arte-arte, Dianne, ha! Para naman ‘yon sa kanya! At saka, ano naman ang ikinatatampo mo diyan!? Jowa ka lang, hindi magulang!” pagsusuway ko sa aking sarili.

“At saka, ‘di ba ‘yan din ‘yong gusto mo for him? It is nothing wrong that he is now finding a way to meet his parents. Besides, I should support him.” I nodded to myself.

“I should be happy for him,” I whispered and then I lay on my bed.

Minsan may pagkakataon din na napapagod na ako sa sarili ko, na nakakapagod na ring mabuhay. It is really exhausting to fight to your life, to fight for your dreams. And sometimes, I just to give up everything that I did for myself.

I chose this course for my future, for myself because I know that architecture will help me to sustain my needs. I know that this is my talent, drawing is my hobby and I need to enhance my skills in drawing more.

But then I realized, am I good enough? Am I talented when it comes in drawing? Do I really know how to do my plates well? Am I doing well in my course? Am I really a Dean’s Lister? Am I really trying my best to be an honor student?

If someone will try to ask me those questions, for sure I am the first one who will doubt my answers. I am not really good at it. Well, I am just a big disappointment in my family & my friends. Also to myself and yeah... it includes Friz.