Silhouettes of the Past | ✓

21

“Vixen, bakit umiiyak ka?” Natauhan ako dahil doon, mabilis kong pinahid ang luha ko bago ako lumunok at ngumiti ng pilit. Sakit mo na naman sa puso Eros Kaiden.

“Ah, na-miss ko lang po ang mg kapatid ko,” I lied. When Natalie committed suicide, we moved in here. 

“Tulog na. Umakyat ka na rin at magpahinga. Mabuti na lang at umabot ka pa sa last round ng trip. Bakit kasi hindi mo na lang ipinagpabukas? O kaya’y tumawag ka para masundo ka ng driver natin.” 

Ngumiti ako bago humingi ng dispensa kay Mama Serina, ayaw kong makaabala. Sobrang laki na ng naitulong nila sa amin. Baon na baon na kami sa utang na loob. Tumango lang naman siya sa akin at sinabing nag-aalala daw siya dahil baka may kung anong mangyari sa akin sa daan lalo pa’t gabi na at malakas ang ulan.

“Sige ika’y magpahinga na, hija.” 

“Tulungan ko na po kayo.” Umiling siya sa akin bago mahinang natawa.

“Sanay na ako sa isang ito, lagi naman itong ganito kapag nalalasing. Gusto ko ngang bawalan kaso ayaw ko namang isipin niyang kinokontrol ko siya. She’s adult already.” She heaved a heavy sigh. “Sa lahat naman kasi anak, bakit sa best friend ka pa nahulog?” 

I smiled before bowing my head and heading to my room. The whole night I just stared at the starry night sky from the window. I breathe deeply before wiping my tears. You shouldn’t be this weak Vixen. Collect yourself, you shouldn’t cry over a man. But I failed.

Thursday morning I woke up with Lexia and Janzei lying beside me, they are waiting for me to wake up. 

“Happy birthday Ate namin!” They both exclaimed before pulling me into a tight hug. Mukha akong pattie na inipit sa monay.

Birthday ko pala? Hindi ko man lang namalayan.

We celebrated my day unlikely of what we used to, Lola Almeira opted to have a grand birthday celebration as I turned 26. I can never say no because they really wanted to pull it out, they even designed the garden last night so I will have no choice but to agree.

“Happy birthday Vixen! Whatever your plans are, I will support you girl.” Maurice stated.

I smiled and nodded at her, she’s back to her usual self, I felt sad. How can she be that strong? How can she hide her feelings when she’s sober?

“We should not be a slave of loving!” She added.

I repeated her words in my head before nodding. Yeah. We shouldn’t. I wonder how it taste like swallowing all your words. 

“Yes we should not be.” I affirmed. Sounds so plastic but what can I do? She laughed at my response, she probably noticed how untruthful  my comment was.

“We’re 26, what’s your plan now?” I bit my lower lip before smiling awkwardly. I told her my decision and she clasped her hand in anticipation of what’s about to happen. Her eyes were glimmering and a genuine warm smile was plastered in her beautiful face. It’s as if she already imagined me as an artist.

With not less than a month, I saw myself hanging along with different people I just met. They’re too good to be true and I wonder how people make conclusions about us. As week passes by, our population decreases. Every weekends, I would always pray for another week.

There was also a love team going on with my co-dreamers but I don’t give a damn. I no longer care about love, as for now, my family and my siblings will be my top priority. Mama’s freedom and the well-being of the whole Alextre family.

“Vixen, do you like Dwight?” Nikha asked. She’s been consistent in asking me that so I smiled at her and shook my head. I can’t like someone if it’s not him.