Chupacabra | 18+ | ✔️

▪︎■ 28 ■▪︎

▪︎■ Adrin Bianchi ■▪︎

I took the cup and put it on the table after standing up.

"Come on, little one," I said to Erlina while looking at Ainara, nodding to the door to signal her to come with us.

After Erlina enlightening me about Ainara's real state, a damn big part of my anger disappeared and I remembered how strong the feeling was back then when we had talked- I knew everything we shared was honest back then and I knew we were kindret spirits. Maybe that was it what made me feel this incredible attraction and at the same time hate towards her. I hated myself and I hated the things on her that reminded me of myself. I felt this invisible energy, force- like magnets that are charged the same way. The constant pulling towards her followed by the force pushing us apart was the perfect metaphor for the attraction and hate involved. Because I did feel it- attraction, going beyond the mere physical aspects and definition. At last she was like me. She understood me, she was able to see beyond my mask.

That's what made it so difficult. Being pulled between my need to feel understanding for once, which I craved so very deeply, and the need to keep my mask on to keep me from getting hurt, which I feared would end me if I ever let someone in fully again and if they abused their power.

Before I could make one step, I felt a little hand grabbing my leg. I looked down to see the girl trying to reach my hand, then giving up and just holding tightly onto the fabric of my slacks.

It made me think... She obviously saw so much, had to endure things no person should ever go through- let alone a literal child. But still she reached her hand out to me, being vulnerable in front of a man that scared her and whom she neither knew nor had a reason to trust.

Sometimes I wished to be able to do what she just did. To trust someone again without living in the past. Maybe I just projected too much into it but it left a deep imprint on me nevertheless.

I smiled and reached down slightly so that she was able to grab my hand instead. Her fingers wrapped around only a few of my fingers and I wanted to get going but stopped when she demanded me to wait.

I wanted to ask her about it but it quickly became unnecessary when she reached her other hand out to the back and followed the motion through her head, turning in the same direction. Ainara came walking towards her and took her hand with a smile. Beautiful. Then our eyes met. They were filled with need and guilt. She made me feel so many fucking things.

So many thoughts stirred inside my head. Her lying to me, using me, betraying me. I still didn't know why I let her live. Why I felt so devastated to know she did me wrong... I shouldn't feel anything in the first place. But I did. Anger, greater than anything. And through all of this there was the side of me that still thought about her the same. Or at least wanted to believe she was the same person I got to know somehow. My dick did the worst of it all by telling me how goddamn beautiful and hot she was. How I still had the need to feel her, taste her, lose myself in her.

There were her eyes. Beautiful, deep, green. I remembered Erlina just telling me she had nightmares and scars because of her father. She wouldn't lie to her daughter, would she? Erlina even said she hasn't told her it was her father but that she could tell nonetheless. One look inside those green eyes and I knew her daughter said the truth. Something, she would have rather not shared with me.

Too many questions, too many emotions. I could just talk to her but the last thing I wanted was to be alone with her. It was enough to see her in my house. I couldn't let all these emotions out. I felt like I was about to burst from all these fucking feelings though.