Skulls and Scars

Stairway To Heaven.

I didn't sleep.
Actually, I couldn't blink an eye.
My adrenaline was up in the sky high; I still couldn't believe in my ears.
Was that a dream...? A post-sex delirious fever...? Was I tripping...? I pinched my own cheek to see if I wasn't dissociating. Damn, it hurt!
I wasn't dreaming nor tripping... Ghost really did say that he loved me. He really loved me! What do I do?!?

I looked at the digital clock on the nightstand and it was accusing 3:45 am. I didn't know what to do; Ghost was dozing off on top of me, and he was relaxed. That was the first time in days, since we started having these sleepovers, that I saw him relaxed and laying on his stomach while getting sleepy. He has always been a "back on the mattress, back on the wall" type of guy.

I moved a bit because I was feeling an imminent leg cramp happening. Ghost promptly opened his eyes and looked at me. He slowly got his torso up and fixed his boxer and sweatpants, looking around a bit confused. He tried to look for my booty shorts but ended up finding a ripped piece of black fabric on the floor. He clearly raised an eyebrow inside the balaclava; I had to laugh.

- I owe you a new pair of shorts...

- It's okay, no worries. - I got up and put on a pair of sweatpants.

- I should get going before anybody sees me leaving your barrack.

- That's the part I hate the most...

His gaze softened upon hearing me saying that. He quickly lifted his balaclava halfway and gave me a quick kiss, pulling back down right away. As soon as the door slid shut behind him, my smile disappeared, being replaced by astonishment.
I was still trying to process his declaration to me. Who says "I love you, sweetie" so casually after sex?!?

I really wanted to believe that he said it in an impulse, that he blurted that out while enjoying his orgasm, I guess... I didn't want to go through another illusion and a possible heartbreak again. What we had with each other had no emotional strings attached. He stated that way.

I tried to sleep until the alarm goes off, to no avail. I was too anxious over that situation. I just gave up and went for a shower, in hopes to quiet my mind and freshen up.
I've set up to start the day, and the workload was a bit too much: I had documents to back it up and registered intel to make copies of it. Ghost was being his usual self; and he has been away the whole morning plus lunch. At the cafeteria, I was visibly moody.

- Aye, Kleine Schwester! What's the bother? - König had bit the sandwich under the hood mask.

- Lots of things in my head, König... That's all.

- Care to share the load with me?

- I'll use hypothesis because is for a 'friend'... Is that okay? - my face was hot.

- No judgments here.

- Okay... Let's say that..."Hypothetically", there's a person you share some intimate relationship with for a while that just decides to declare to you after having a... Messy sex.

König nearly choked on the straw in his orange juice, clearly mortified with my hypothesis. His green eyes were widened while he was coughing uncontrollably, trying to regain control of his throat. I was sitting next to him, hunching over my meal tray.

- Heilige sheiße, mein kleine Schwester! T-that hypothesis almost killed me here!

- I-I'm sorry, König! - I was embarassed; I hid my face on my hands.

- My apologies for the reaction! - He took a deep breath and recollected himself. - I admit that was very s-sudden. Go on, please.

- Well, then... "Hypothetically" speaking, your relationship has agreements of not being emotionally invested, but after the... The... - I cleared my throat, my face was feverish. - But after the deed, you notice that the person is gradually lowering its guard to the point of letting that escape. What would you do?