Accidentally in Love [Brett Hand x OC]

11

When everyone arrived that morning, many people startled at the sight of Reagan's eyes.

"Ooh, girl, your eyes are sunken!" Gigi exclaimed as she waltzed in. "You look like if Steve Buscemi made it with Steve Buscemi. You okay?"

Theo studied her sister's face, she hadn't even noticed Reagan's eye bags. To avoid feeling like a bad sister, Theodora reminded herself that she was mad at Reagan at the moment.

"Guys, I'm honestly fine." Reagan insisted. "I've been channeling my stress into this scream bag," She held up a brown paper bag, "and into my latest invention!"

Oh, so that's what Reagan had been working on late at night, Theodora thought to herself.

"Behold, the Productivitron!" Reagan announced, pulling a string so four metal arms protruded from her back.

"Oh God, robot arms!" Brett exclaimed, jumping backwards. Theodora remained unfazed, she knew her sister was capable of creating something so... her.

"I'm still working out the kinks, but it's a set of bio-cranial robot arms that will increase my productivity 600%!" Reagan continued proudly. "Now I can simultaneously finish paperwork, ignore my dad's texts and you know, strangle my sister when she gets on my nerves, I guess!"

Everyone blanked her, mostly concern on their faces.

"Every day you edge closer to becoming a super villain." Myc said, almost in a disappointed tone.

Just as Reagan's robotic arms gave Myc the finger, alarms began blaring.

"Oh God, what is that?" Brett asked nervously, looking around.

"Is it a nuclear disaster?" Glenn stood.

"No!" Gigi's voice came out strangled, "It's even worse, it's a P.R disaster!"

"I'm not gonna sugarcoat it." J.R stormed in, "This is a 13-alarm crap fire. I accidentally hit 'reply all' to a company-wide email where I made a very un-PC joke about reptoids."

"Question." Brett raised his hand. "What is... reptoids?"

"Oh, just your classic shape-shifting lizard people that live in secret amongst humanity." J.R explained, displaying a case file on the screen.

"We're talking politicians, celebrities." Gigi took over the explanation as pictures of celebrity reptoids appeared on the screens.

Brett gasped, "Madonna's an iguana?"

"Reptoids provide a lot of our company's funding, and in exchange, we prevent the world from doing anything about global warming to keep them at their preferred body heat." J.R explained. "If we want to keep this year's funding, we need to kiss ass at their annual Reptoid Gala to get them to sign this contract. It's being held at their stronghold at Yale."

"Ah, I remember my days at Yale," Brett begun to speak, "I was the most popular guy in my frat. They hazed me every year."

Theodora glanced at Brett with a concerned expression., everyone else seemed to do the same.

"Sounds like they hated you..." Andre said hesitantly.

"Ha-ha!" Brett laughed. "Nice haze burn, Andre. You must really like me." Theo's eyebrows raised in confusion.

"Do I have to go?" Reagan butt in. "Follow-up question. Do I have to wear a dress? Follow-up to the follow-up. Does it have to be a stain-free dress?"

"No, you can't recycle your old Space Jam prom dress yet again, Reagan!" Theodora groaned, her head in her hands.

"Yes, this is serious." J.R added.

"What?" Reagan looked between J.R and Theodora, "That dress is awesome! And if you don't agree, you're a mon-"

"Monster, yeah, yeah." Everyone else finished her sentence.

"Normal dress! Theo, take your sister shopping." J.R demanded. "And for the love of God, comb your hair. It's a sign of respect." Theodora nodded to J.R.

"Why should we give those reptoid freaks respect?" Glenn demanded, "Half-man, half-animal, they're disgusting!"

"Says him." Theo muttered to Gigi, who chuckled.

"Glenn, that's exactly the type of no-no talk that could end our funding, which is why I've signed you all up for reptoid sensitivity training." J.R said. Everyone groaned at that except for Brett,

"Training? Hell yeah! Who's ready to get some reps in?" He seemed excited, before his smile dropped, "Oh no, is 'reps' offensive to say?"

"Just because Glenn's racist doesn't mean we all are." Theodora said in a disgruntled tone. "Is this really necessary?"

"Yes! Now get your asses down to HR right now!" J.R barked.

So the group unwillingly went to inhuman resources where they where they were going to listen to a seminar about reptoids.

"You know, I'm actually excited for the reptoid gala!" Brett said as they made their way there.

"Me too," Gigi responded, "but I'm more excited to dress up than anything else."

"What about you, Theo?" Brett turned to her,

"Oh, same as Gigi." She smiled, "I love any excuse to get dressed up!"

"Of course you do." Came Reagan's input, for she was walking behind the three of them.

"Didn't ask for your opinion, bitch." Theo said over her shoulder, before they entered the room.

"Theo, play nice with your sister." Myc scolded as they all took their seats.

"Brett, Gigi, next to me." Theodora nudged her sister out of the way so she could sit next to her friends. Reagan only made a small 'tsk' then sat on the other side of Brett. Her sister was so immature, acting like they were in high school.

"Hi everyone, welcome to Inhuman Resources." The moth guy started talking, "I'm Mr Mothman. I'm a mothman. Let's talk about reptoids, be sure to follow these dos and don'ts to avoid a diplomatic incident."

Mr Mothman clicked to the next slide, "Do offer them a cricket, mouse, or vole out of your pocket."

"Question." Theodora raised her hand, "Why would we ever have any of those just lying around in our pockets? Are we supposed to carry them around in case a reptoid wants one?"

"Theodora." Reagan groaned, rubbing her temples, "Does it matter? You're dragging this on."

"Yes, it matters." Theodora snapped, leaning over Brett to look at her sister.

"Just shut up!" Reagan replied, turning her tired eyes on Theo.

"Can you guys please stop arguing?" Myc yelled, to which everyone else agreed.

"Okay, movin' on." Mr Mothman said tentatively, "Don't use loaded phrases like 'hissy fit'."

"Reagan's having a hissy fit right now." Theodora muttered under her breath, and Gigi hid her laugh under her hand.

"Or, 'see you later, alligator'." Mr Mothman continued.

"Got it, be respectful." Andre spoke up, "So when do we talk about the orgies?"

"Oh my God." Theodora muttered as the rest booed Andre, rightfully.

"What?" Andre glanced around the room, "Everyone knows reptoids have orgies." He said with a giggle.

"Sign me up!" Myc exclaimed, "I love sex, and I am fucking good at it."

"Freaks." Gigi murmured to Theo.

"This is okay to say in here, right?" Myc added hastily.

"This is a HR meeting!" Mr Mothman exclaimed in shock.

"Andre, Myc, shut the hell up, or I will castrate you." Reagan snapped.

"Ha! Good luck figuring out which one of my tentacles is a dick." Myc responded coolly. At that, he and Andre were kicked out of the meeting and everyone took 5 minutes to reconvene.