South Park: Dragging Me Down

Pathetic

The plate jangled as Mysterion dropped his fork onto it, causing Pip to wince. He made a dramatic show of signalling for Michael to come over and the goth boy removed their empty plates.

"I hoped you liked the cake." he said courteously.

"It was lovely!" Pip replied. "T-Thank you for making it."

"It was actually Pete who did that, but whatever. I'll tell him." he stepped back towards the counter.

"You know what? I'm going to do you a favour and write a five star review on Yelp." Mysterion chortled.

"Yippee." droned Michael from across the room. "I'll be sure to ignore it."

Mysterion chuckled and looked across at Pip, who was smiling aimlessly at being treated so well. He made eye contact with Mysterion and tilted his head.

"Did you want to leave now? To do more superhero stuff?"

"Uh, yeah, probably should." he yawned, slouching in his seat. He pushed himself upright and Pip followed, walking back over to the counter.

"You off then?" Michael asked.

"Yeah."

"Finally." Henrietta sounded, turning to face them. "Hey, Brit? Stop worrying about that goddamn outfit. It's yours."

"O-Okay!" he squeaked. "I'm-"

"Don't. Just don't." Michael ordered. "You're always welcome back here. Just don't get blabbing about us two, you got it?"

"Y-Yes sir! I won't say anything about your... um... relations. I don't actually have any friends, you see, so I wouldn't be able to say anything to anyone anyway. N-Not that I would ever do such a thing anyway! I-I could never do that to anyone! Um, sorry. I-I'll go now." he bowed nervously, causing the goths to smirk.

"You're alright, kid. Later, underoos."

"Bye."

Mysterion and Pip left the cafe. They walked behind the building and Mysterion climbed up the drainpipe, helping Pip up there. Both teens stepped on the roof. Mysterion looked around at South Park's quiet streets and sighed, taking in the cool air. Pip shivered next to him, also looking at the quiet town below.

"You did so well in there." Mysterion started, turning towards Pip.

"I-I did?"

"Yeah! I know socializing isn't your cup of tea, if you pardon the pun-" he paused as Pip let out a giggle. "But you did really good. I'm proud of you."

Pip's mouth dropped open. "Y-You're... you're proud of me?"

"Of course I am!"

"Nobody's ever-" he started, feeling wobbly, "s-said anything like that to me before... I-I didn't think I could make anyone proud."

"Well you made me super proud. I'm glad I'm your friend."

Pip bowed modestly. "Thank you! I really do appreciate it!" he bowed his head. "Um, so, what do you wish to do now? Wait for some crime or something?"

"Yeah, do that, but perhaps to pass the time I could start training you like I said I would. How does that sound?" Mysterion asked.

"T-Training? I mean, I don't think I'll be any good at it but okay, I guess..." he shrugged.

"You'll be fine! I'm basically just going to teach you how to dodge properly. That way, when someone goes to hit you, you can avoid them swiftly. It'll help you in the long run."

"But what if I deserve being hit?" Pip asked.

"What?"

"What if I was hit because I deserved it?" Pip repeated.