Fall in Love or Fall Apart

Chapter 5

Carol stood quiet for a moment thinking of the right words. Then she asked me the question that I dreaded most.

"Were you abused?" She looked at me understandingly no pity in her eyes at all.

"Y-Yes." I stuttered. She nodded and started to walk away thinking I was done, but I continued. "By my father. So was Daryl and Merle. Probably why Merle left. I never told Daryl, but one night dad came home so drunk he.. um..."

"Honey it's okay you don't have to continue." Carol said.

"But I want to. He didn't rape me if that's what you're thinking. He'd always tell how he would never do that to his own child." I scoffed. "Plus I'd never let him get that close and he knew Daryl and Merle would kill his ass. He came home drunk off his ass. More than usual and stabbed me in the side. He wouldn't let me go to the hospital so I had to stitch and clean it up myself."

I lifted my shirt just so she could the one scar. I wouldn't dare to show her the others. She gasped. Then hugged me.

"How'd you know?" I saw fear rim her eyes, but it quickly disappeared.

"My husband, Ed, abused me." She didn't continue. But she didn't need to. We sat there hugging each other tight.

Then I heard loud footsteps running up the stairs.

"Enid are you okay?!" Carl yelled as he rushed into the room. Carol kissed the top of my head and left. Leaving me and Carl by ourselves.

"Yeah I knocked over a glass of water and fell onto the broken glass." I stopped and used my British accent. "I'm not as proper as one should be." We both laughed then he left. What the heck? Whatever.

A few minutes he returned.

"Where'd you go?" I said eyeing him.

"Remember? It's my turn to make lunch." He handed me a sandwich. I smiled thanking him and ate my whole sandwich while he had only three bites in.

"Well, someone was hungry." He snickered.

"It's the apocalypse. I'm always fucking hungry!" I playfully yelled.

We finished. And I walked out. Carl said he wanted to show me something. I grabbed my bow and went to the woods with Carl. We walked a little further until he pointed out a walker that was in the mud.

" I didn't want to shoot it because it would make to much noise." I nodded understanding what he meant. That would only attract more. I loaded my crossbow and shot the walker straight through its eyeball. It fell back. As I went to go retrieve my arrow I slipped falling into the mud. Carl laughed.

"What's so funny Grimes?" I said throwing mud at him. Soon we had a full out mud war. We eventually stopped and I grabbed my arrow and we walked back.

"Shit." I said.

"What?" Carl asked turning towards me.

"If they ask we were at the pond and had a mud fight. Okay?"

"I don't wanna lie." Carl looked down at his feet. "I can't lie again." I understood what he meant by that. A few days ago he had stolen a gun. They found out and he got in trouble. But now they were learning to shoot.

"Well. What if it wasn't a lie?" I started to walk towards the pond. He caught in after a second and followed. We were standing at the edge when I felt something cold drip down my shirt. More mud.

"That's it cowboy!" I scooped a big piece of mud up and threw it at him. We went back and forth. I ran away as he chased me with a giant chunk of dirt. I ran onto the pier and quickly ran out of pier. I turned around and saw Carl creeping closer to me. He dropped the dirt then pushed me into the pond. I came back up to see him laughing.

"Okay. Carl. Just pull me up."

He obeyed and put his arm out so I could grab on. But before he had a chance to pull me up, I yanked him down.

I heard laughing and saw Carol and Lori looking at us.

I pointed at Carl and childishly said "He started it!" Carl splashed me and I splashed back.

"Okay. You two go take a shower. You're filthy." Carol said. Carl got in first so I went to check on Beth. It was about 7:00pm now. Still a little bit of light in the sky. I opened Beth's door and saw her still in the state. I pulled up a chair and sat down. I told her about today and how much I missed her. Then Maggie walked in carrying some clothes.

"Here." She handed them to me. "There Beth's old ones she grew out of." It made sense, since Beth was 15 and I was two years younger. I thanked her, kissed the top of Beth's head as usual and left.

Carl had already left the shower so I walked in. The bathroom was nice. They had a full length mirror, toilet, sink and a shower-bath. I haven't really looked at myself in a while. I've come to use the bathroom in here, however I never looked at myself.

I studied every detail of me. I was disgusting. My nails had dirt under em, my face was still recovering and so was my arm. I pulled out a plastic bag and removed the gauze from my arm and wrapped the plastic taping it to my arm so no water got in.

I pulled off my shirt and saw all the scars on me. I was very pale, and my ribs were slightly sticking out. I wasn't small enough to be a twig, but I definitely needed to eat more. I only ever really ate lunch with Carl. I stripped down and stepped in the shower. I scrubbed my skin till it was raw and felt clean. My nails were the hardest. I had to use my knife to get out the dirt. I was a brunette, but from all the blood and dirt on me I couldn't tell. Now as I stepped out of the shower I saw my hair return to its natural chocolate-brown color. I put on the clothes Maggie gave me. It was a pair of jeans and a red tank top. I brushed my hair and grabbed my dirty clothes and went outside. I changed the bandages on me and I walked to my tent pulling on my leather jacket since at night it was a little nippy. Everyone was inside deciding Randall's fate and I saw Andrea on top of the RV. I could tell she really wanted to be there.

"Andrea!" I yelled up to her. "Go on in. I'll take over."

"Thanks." She replies and jogged towards the house. I sat on the RV. Alone. In silence. I hated this the most. Being alone in silence. This is when my mind wandered to my dad. I thought about every night he came home drunk and hurt me, Daryl, or Merle. For some reason I turned out a little different. Sure I had a temper like them, but I was softer. Daryl was tough. I mean I knew I was strong and pretty bad ass, but I was.. I was just...softer.

I was snapped out of my thoughts when I heard a scream. This all seemed to familiar. I ran towards the screams with everyone else following me. I got there first since I was the fastest runner and saw Dale. His stomach open his insides coming out. I shot the bastard walker with an arrow, stabbing it multiple times.

"Enid. Stop. Please." I heard a sad Carl say.

I stopped and saw Rick holding a gun to his head, but he couldn't do it. Daryl walked over and said "sorry brother." And shot him. We were all silent. Andrea was sobbing louder and screaming than everyone combined. Dale, Andrea and her sister Amy were together when this thing started. And now Andrea was the only one left. I held her as she cried into my shoulder. Everyone else walked away leaving me to watch over Andrea. Rick came back with T-Dog in a truck and they loaded Dales body into it. Andrea wanted to walk back so here we were in the middle of the field at midnight. We were close to the house when she stopped. I turned around and heard her start talking.

"Enid. Thank you. You're always the one to comfort and help everyone else. You helped Carol cope with Sophia being gone, you always are getting more chores done even when you think you spend most of your time with Carl. You offered to take watch and here you are now, with me."

I hugged her and she kissed my head. We walked back together in silence.