thorns and other maladies

11

a list of reasons i love you

i don't think anyone has ever looked at me the way you do / like you are feeling everything all at once / like i really am the whole world to you / you listen / even when you don't understand / but you still always want to understand / you buy me roses / because you know i love roses and not just because they're easy / you apologize / and i can tell that you mean it / you get angry but never at me / it is something you control / rather than something you ignore / you have actual opinions on my outfits / rather than a comment about how revealing or appropriate it is / and you are always kind about it / even when you disagree with my fashion / but usually you like how i dress / and you love my makeup that my family always teases me about / you actually want to match outfits with me / and not just because you know i like to / you like me in all the ways i come / you seem worried when i cry / you smile so brightly when you make me laugh / when we have sex / it's not a perfect passionate love scene like in the movies / but you always check on me / and you care if i enjoy it / you always want to touch me / but it feels less predatory and more / desperate / like you are desperate for me / you read my love poems because you want to / you begged me to let you read one / and when you did you seemed so giddy / and then you looked at me with this smile on your face like you were just / in awe of me / and you gave me real feedback / not just that you liked it / but what lines were your favorite / and what lines confused you for a moment / you want to listen to my music / you don't question my life choices / or question how serious i am about my future / or tell me how unstable my career choices are / you get angry when i talk about my father / or my rapist / or my ex / like you are angry for me / like you feel rage for me / like you want to tear apart every person that has hurt me / you are protective and sometimes even jealous / but you never make it my fault / and you never make it my problem / when you are upset you will talk about it / not always during but always after / you say you love me and i believe it / you give me the passion i always dreamed of / and the quiet love i wanted too / you kiss me like i'm made of caffeine and sugar / like you'll never get enough of me / and there is something so addicting about kissing you / it's feeling so wanted and so loved / i think i could kiss you for eternity / i think i could love you for eternity / and i don't think i would mind / no i don't think i would.